Monday, November 9

Friends

Me at church yesterday: "Hm. She looks fun. I could be her friend."
Brit: "So go be her friend. Go hug her! Right now!"

Obviously, nothing came of that conversation. But it did get me thinking. How do people make friends? I am extraordinarily bad at it. I connect with so few people, and I have a hard time making "casual friends." Either I'm all in and you get to see every little bit of my quirky personality and inappropriate comments, or we pretty much never talk. As a result, I don't have many friends. I think my Utah count is up to 5, none of whom I see with any sort of regularity. I hate that. I wish I had the personality to just connect with people, to call people up and hang out, or invite couples over for dinner and games. I think come across as standoffish, and I don't mean to. I just really don't know how to connect.

This is not meant to be a self-pity post, by the way. I am just honestly baffled at the process one goes through to start talking to someone, connect on a personal level, and begin to call that person "friend." I don't even know how I've done it in the past, it just seems to magically develop. So if anyone is ever wanting someone to hang out, please call me up, and I'll try to not be too awkward.

5 comments:

Raymond and Amy Lambert Family said...

Agreed. Yes, I have friends, but I never feel like I can call someone up and say hey, come over or I'm coming over. I feel awkward doing that!

Kristina P. said...

I actually met one of my oldest friends that way. She was sitting in church by herself, and I introduced myself. She still tells people that story.

You met my coworker Amanda, at my shower. She and I are very similar and she is one of my now best friends. I remember when I suggested we first meet up for lunch and shopping. I felt awkward! Like I was asking her out on a date.

The Boob Nazi said...

I COMPLETELY AGREE!! It's so hard and awkward to try and make friends.

Mary said...

I feel your pain. I probably have 5 close friends here in Florida...and none of which are from Church. I find it harder to make friends with people at church than at work, or with other military wives.

I honestly doubt most of the adults at church have ever seen me be myself...but the teenagers in my Sunday School class see it every week :o)

heather said...

So true. I have really struggled with this lately too - It seems like when I feel the "pressure" to become friends with someone, then I never act like myself and it doesn't just 'click' like I want it to. Still working on it out here in Ohio ... it's hard work! And to be a little honest, I'm getting tired of it. Ahhh ... enough complaining. :)