Thursday, November 12

Umm... Awkward!

I've never been shy about sharing my adoption story. I love talking about it. But then, it hasn't come up too much in random conversations, and I try not to get into it unnecessarily. It's a hard story to condense into a few sentences and still have people understand, and it gets awkward when you launch into this big long story about having a baby and placing her for adoption.

I got a taste yesterday of the issues this pregnancy can cause me. I went to the dentist for a routine cleaning, and the dentist and everyone who found out I was pregnant (so, everyone who touched my mouth or asked me questions) asked the standard "Oh, so is this your first?" What do you say at that point, really? I guess it depends on the reason they're asking. No, this is not my first pregnancy. Yes, this is my first time being a mom. Usually I just explain no, it's not my first, I had a girl 3 years ago, and most people leave it at that. Great. The dentist went on to ask questions about my first, and comment on how busy I'll be. "Umm... yeah... busy...." Luckily he dropped it, but it made me think. What do I do when people ask those questions in the future? What would you do? Just say it's my first and leave it, explain the whole situation, or let people believe I have a three year old? This is going to be an interesting 7 months.


8 comments:

The Boob Nazi said...

Yeah, that would be an awkward situation. I don't know what I would do in it.

Kristina P. said...

I never thought about this aspect!

Stimpson's said...

Hey there cousin! That is also a difficult question for me ever since Karleigh died when I get asked how many kids I have, or what ages are my kids. I simply go by what I feel in the moment. If I am simply not in the mood to go into the details or if I think they are just simply being nosey for the sake of being nosey and don't really have a genuine interest in caring - then I just say 3 kids. If I know it is someone that I will see again or have some kind of friendship or I can tell that they actually care, then I might share it with them. I just go off of my gut feelings, the mood I am in and whether or not I feel that they are sincere enough for me to share such sensitive information. Good luck with your answers! You will have it the rest of your life! And CONGRATS on the baby!!! How fun for you!

Que and Brittany's Adoption Journal said...

Gosh I don't know. What a hard question!

heather said...

I can totally see how that would be awkward! I liked your cousin's comment - it seems to be the one that makes sense to me and my way of thinking. I hope you figure out what works best for you.

Valerie said...

Know this feeling! It IS awkward, and hard in the moment to decide what to say. But I think you're cousin's right--you have to go with your gut, decide whether it really matters to this person. Good luck!

Mary said...

Along with everyone else, I agree with your cousin's comment.

Jackie said...

I relate to your situation in a way(# 5 was a late miscarriage). I just say I have 4 children, I got sick of all the 'splaining I had to do.Birth moms are so close to my heart because our 3rd we adopted. Go birth moms!