Upside of Down

Oh yeah, there was that holiday...

2011-11-20T22:07:00.001-07:00

Hey, did you know Halloween happened like 3 weeks ago?

Did you know Corbin was the cutest boy ever to grace the holiday?

See? Told you. (That's a giraffe in his hands... a lion's gotta eat!)

Brit's brother and sister-in-law were in town, so we joined them at Erin's house for trick-or-treating. Corbin did ok, for a 1-year-old, but he was not excited about the idea of trick-or-treating. Oh he loved the candy, but we ended up carrying him for 99% of the trip. I just love Halloween. I'm so glad he's already in the "tradition" of celebrating every year.

More pictures, because words are boring...

Rawr!

Brit as Doctor Who

The Doctor and K-9

Cousins

More Cuteness

...have you passed out from the cuteness yet? I'll spare you and move on to other kids....

The Gang

Chess, in her own costume

Corbin's attitude about trick-or-treating...

Words

2011-10-05T23:25:00.001-06:00

Corbin doesn't say much. He's learned a lot of signs, but his words are still pretty much mush. I've noticed that he uses the same mush with the same signs every time, though, so I'm calling them words. Instead of trying to spell them out phonetically I took videos of the ones he uses-- all done, more, and up. Of course he babbles all day long and says "mamamama" and "dadadadada"... whether or not he's referring to us, I have yet to determine.

These are so weird, Brit still doesn't believe me that they are actual words. Well... they're not. But Corbin thinks they are, so who am I to argue?

1: All Done

2: More (the "muhmuhmuh" right before I turn off the camera)

3: Up. This one is the weirdest, and takes the longest time to get him to stop whining and talk to me. He holds his hands up in the air (although he's digressed to just holding his ears... I guess holding them all the way up is simply too tiring) and says "eee?" Yeah, sure, that sounds just like "Up".....

On a somewhat random note... he also likes to stand at the top of the stairs and yell "Biiiht?" at the top of his lungs. It doesn't seem to mean anything, but I'm wondering if this is a reflection of how often I stand at the top of the stairs and yell for Brit....

Kid in a Box

2011-10-05T23:10:00.002-06:00

15 months, other happenings

2011-09-20T09:09:00.002-06:00

At 15 months, Corbin:

is 25 lbs {55%, and he's lost weight since his 12 month checkup}

33.5 inches {97+%}

So he's gotten tall and skinny!

+Still takes 2 naps a day, but sometimes drops his 2nd nap

+Still drinks 4 sippies of milk a day

+LOVES juice, hates water {we're trying to wean him out of this!}

+Also loves: goldfish, cheddar rice cakes, pretzels, FRUIT SNACKS, raspberries, blueberries, strawberries, bananas, cereal with milk, hot dogs

+Eats at his own pace... some days, hardly anything; other days, he's a bottomless pit!

+Dances whenever he hears music

+Waves Bye-Bye

+Loves to sneak-attack hug... he comes up to me about 10 times a day to grab my legs and bury his face in them

+Loves his ball popper, throwing balls around, and taking all the tupperware and measuring cups out of the drawers

+Loves banging on keyboards and remotes and phones... but only if they work. No faking him out with broken play equipment.

+Loves to go outside and walk around, but hates the playground

+Has a mind of his own! He definitely knows how to throw a mini-tantrum. If I try to hold his hand when we're out, he will throw his head back, stamp his feet, scream, and try to bite my hand. It's lovely.

+He has EXPLODED in communication skills this last month! I feel like something has "clicked" in his brain, and he understands infinitely more of what we say, and makes a visible effort to communicate back.

Words he says: Doggy, Daddy {these two sound the same}, MaMa, More, Nonnie {although he will probably forget this one before he needs it again}

Words he tries: All Done {he says something like "a-ya" while making the sign}, Milk {I think he's used it once, anyway}

Words he signs: Up, More, All Done, Please {he walks around signing Please for EVERYTHING, like maybe we're holding something out on him}

He is copying us more and more, and making an effort to tell us what he wants. The other day, I was trying to get him to sign "juice," which we had never used before. I could tell he knew what I was asking {"Do you want some juice?"} without seeing it, and he whined {his very elegant way of saying "yes"} and then tried to copy my sign for "Juice." He ended up just hitting himself in the side of his head, but hey, A for effort!

He also suddenly loves to read, and his very favorite book is Baby's First 100 Words, followed closely by his other word book. Not that he actually stays on any one page long enough for me to READ to him, but he still brings it to me and climbs in my lap every chance he gets to look through it.

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I've started a new blog. I have a lot of these now. And I'm not going to share the link to this one, but I will share the thought process. I am a terrible journal keeper, as probably evidenced by this outstanding blog right here. There are too many memories that I think "Oh, I will always remember this," only to forget years down the line. Corbin does so many cute things EVERY DAY that I want to look back and remember when he's a bratty 12 year old and I need to remind myself why I love him. I also want to remember the little milestones, like when he learned to dance to music, and wave bye-bye, and started talking in complete sentences. I want to remember all this, but to blog it for a public audience would either be excruciatingly boring for you, or filled with pressure to make it fun and interesting for me. So I started another blog, and am filling it with several very short {and boring!} entries a day. Things like "Corbin loves baby einstein lately. It's the only thing he will sit still for." I can keep it up because there's no pressure of other people reading and commenting, and I know I will love and appreciate these silly little reminders in years to come.

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I'm back on a regular work schedule. NO, that does not mean I'm working days! I'm back to working every weekend, still all nights. I am totally in love with having a predictable schedule again. It makes me feel like I have more time every week to get things done. In fact, I've started housekeeping for the first time in my life! It feels WONDERFUL to have a clean house. I've made a schedule of chores for each day I'm not working, put it on my phone's to-do list app, and shared it with Brit so he can help me get things done. He really is good at helping me when I tell him exactly what to do, he will never on his own see the problem of a 3-month buildup of pet hair on the carpet.

My favorite age

2011-07-20T21:06:00.001-06:00

"So what's been your favorite age for him?"
"This one!"

Remember when he was brand new and tiny, and just curled up into this perfect little ball that slept all the time?

Remember when he started figuring out how arms work, and learned that he could make the toys rattle if he hit them just so, and so he spent minutes on end focusing on getting his arms to move the way he wanted?

Remember when he first started smiling on purpose? And you would make an utter fool of yourself for a glimpse of that crooked little grin? Remember when he started laughing? And you spent your whole day trying to coax it out, and it was the most beautiful sound in the world, and you saved it as a ringtone on your phone (where it still lives on)?

Remember when he started grabbing his toes, and he was the smartest baby in the whole world for figuring out where his feet were?

Remember when he first started reaching for you, and you really truly felt like "mommy" for the first time?

Remember when he started rolling? Started scooting? Started pulling himself up to stand and you realized your tiny little baby was turning into a toddler?

Remember those first few steps when you realized your whole world was about to change?

Remember when he would yell at the top of his lungs and do the goofiest things, secure in the knowledge that he is the funniest person on earth?

Remember when he would run into your arms and climb into your lap just to snuggle for a minute?

-Oh wait, that was today.

3... I mean, 4 years!

2011-07-08T23:25:00.000-06:00

Our anniversary was last week! I can't believe we've been married 4 years already. I'm really stuck on 3. This is going to take some getting used to.

I wasn't going to do anything for the occasion, what with having a baby around and working most of the weekend, but then my brother just happened to be staying for a few days! We took advantage of his presence and went out for a movie date Saturday, my one night off. We saw Pirates, and used the free tickets we got from a car dealership. It was ever so fancy.

So, four years. Wow. In four years, we've both graduated, I found a job I love, we bought a house, got a dog, had a baby, went through 3 different cars... and I really don't have an elegant segue into pictures.

2007

2008

2009

2010

2011

For Grandy

2011-06-29T10:06:00.000-06:00

I've had these for a while, but I've been in a bit of a photography slump lately and haven't posted them. Grandy (Brit's grandmother) sent Corbin a great toy for his birthday! He doesn't really "get" unwrapping yet, but once it was open, he loved it..... and it's still his favorite.

Silly Boy

2011-06-28T16:26:00.002-06:00

My baby is the greatest, funniest, bestest guy in the whole world. I love making him laugh!! I especially love making him laugh, then stopping for a second and waiting for him to grab me and make me do it again.

I love this kid!!!!

It's my birthday!

2011-06-07T21:08:00.001-06:00

I've been reluctant to post about my birthday because I didn't really take many pictures. Oh well, you can have a summary anyhow.

My birthday included:

+ Work. 3 admits, 1 discharge, 1 transfer.

+ A giant tray of cafeteria junk food, including nachos, frosted brownie, soda, and chocolate-covered gummy bears

+ Telling everyone who said "hi" that it's my birthday!

+ French toast in bed, then lots of sleep

+ Lots of snuggles from my boys

+ Beautiful flowers from my husband

+ Dinner at Texas Roadhouse, including prime rib, cheese fries, and about 5 cherry cokes

+ Costco chocolate cake and Doctor Who!

So you can see, it was a pretty fantastic day. And now I'm 26. I love my birthday.

Carseats

2011-06-06T14:55:00.001-06:00

This photo was taken with my phone on June 2, 2010, on the way home from the hospital:

This picture was taken with my phone on May 31, 2011, on the way to Corbin's birthday lunch:

My baby has turned into a toddler overnight.... *tear*

BIRTHDAYS!!

2011-06-04T13:20:00.000-06:00

Big week. Corbin's birthday was on Tuesday, and my birthday was yesterday. I still want to do a "one year photo shoot" with Corbin, but I need to put some thought into it. I wanted to at least post about the day. It was fun!

We started out with belgian waffles...

Then a bath... still a favorite!

Then to Wheeler Farms after a nap, in his brand new booster seat!

...where he tried some KFC Macaroni & Cheese....

...and saw some animals...

...including this man-eating horse:

(I have a picture of this horse trying to bite us, but I think it looks ridiculous so I'm not sharing. Brit made me keep it. Stupid mean horse.)

After another short nap, we headed up to Smash Burger for a birthday dinner of chicken strips and fries and shake!

...he mostly ate the fries.

But Mom and Dad enjoyed the birthday dinner too!

I promise he did smile at some point during the day. But he was pretty blasé about the whole thing. I guess that's how it goes with one-year-olds and birthdays! I certainly enjoyed myself, and that's really what counts, isn't it?

Yes, I am a Birth Mom

2011-06-03T23:04:00.000-06:00

Every time I check my reader stats on Google (which is admittedly rare), I see visits from places I never expected, and these inevitably turn out to be through links on adoption/birth mom sites. So, I guess people are coming here expecting to see the blog of a birth mom? If it were me, I would be very disappointed in this mediocre, not-at-all-related-to-adoption blog.

It's true, I'm a birth mom. I had a beautiful little girl, Isabelle, over 5 years ago now. For a long time, I talked about it and thought about it almost constantly. At that point you probably could have visited my blog and realized this is a part of my life. I still love Isabelle, she's still a big part of my heart, but that's just not a big part of my life anymore. I've moved on. It's something that happens in a healthy, well-adjusted adoption relationship. We're all happy. Isabelle is growing and thriving, I'm married (to the birth father, as a matter of fact), and we have a baby who just turned one. I have other things to think about now. Every once in a while, you may see a random post about a random visit with a stunningly beautiful and clever little girl. But that's probably all that will come up about adoption from now on.

So, I'm sorry if you're looking for a "birth mother" blog, this probably isn't it. On the other hand, if you do have questions or want to talk about it, I'd be more than happy!!! I honestly do love talking about it, and feeling like I'm helping people through my experiences. Feel free to email me: jenandbrit {at} gmail {.} com

Old School

2011-05-12T08:30:00.000-06:00

I am IN.LOVE. with this picture, taken with my old-fashioned point-and-shoot. (It's so old you can't even see the settings on the dial anymore! Haha.)

It's definitely not as crisp and clear as my DSLR, but with a little photoshop it almost looks intentional. I do love my fancy camera to bits, but taking my little Kodak to the pool forces me to practice actual photography skills, which I definitely lack. Skills like framing and composition, and capturing the right moment. Also it forces me to think more about the lighting, since this camera won't let me manually set the exposure to compensate for bright sun in the background. It's a learning experience!

More Bathtime

2011-04-29T09:28:00.001-06:00

Cute Things My Kid Does

2011-04-27T19:46:00.000-06:00

We went to the pool today with Brit's brother and sister-in-law. I knew Corbin was a fan of the water from his baths, and I was super excited to see how he did in a pool. And I wasn't disappointed! This kid is a FISH!! He went nuts splashing around in the 5-inch deep kiddie pool section, and then decided he wanted to go somewhere else... so he leaned right over and started crawling through the water. He got more than one face-full of pool, but just coughed it out and kept going. His hair was soaked within 5 minutes, just from the splashes. His favorite was when daddy would grab his arms and drag him through the water on his back, in the "deep" (8 inch) end. I cannot wait to bring him to Florida in 2 weeks and spend every day at the beach and in the pool.

Later, on our way home (after grabbing In-N-Out with the in-laws... yesss), we had turned the radio down on Cake's "Short Skirt Long Jacket" so I could make a phone call. After a minute, Corbin started yelling. Brit assumed he was over-tired, I said he was just mad we hadn't turned the song back up yet. Sure enough, after I turned the volume back up, he was fine. What can I say? My kid has good taste. :)

I never did Corbin's 10-month update. I didn't have any new measurements, and I was distracted with our trip to Colorado. By now, I can't remember what happened during March specifically, but I'll try to remember what was new when we were in CO:

~He's crawling everywhere, and pulling himself up on furniture, and walking along said furniture. Nothing can keep this kid contained!!

~He's trying pretty much anything Mom eats. He tried baby food chicken and turkey by the end of the month, and his favorite is Chicken Noodle (stage 2, not the chunky kind.... he gags on chunky baby food, but not on adult food. Weirdo!) He's also started feeding himself cheerios and puffs and goldfish. Finger-foods are now a regular part of his diet.

~He tried the swings while we were in Colorado, and he loved it!

A couple of videos from this month:

March 8: Corbin's early crawling. He could get around, but he's still working on it here. To get him to crawl toward me, I just had to put my laptop on the ground. That got him moving real quick!!

March 25: Corbin's adorable laugh.

There are no words...

2011-04-03T21:49:00.002-06:00

Seriously. Does it get any cuter? I think not.

2011-04-02T20:11:00.001-06:00

Good Advice

2011-04-01T13:19:00.001-06:00

This is why you should take your contacts out more than once every 10 days. And probably should clean off your eye makeup before bed once in a while, too.

[I have a raging infection in my right eye. I have to put in eye drops every 2 hours for 2 days, then every 4 hours for 5 days. Yikes! And apparently, if it doesn't start clearing up by tomorrow, I have to go see an ophthalmologist. Hardcore. No fun. Trust me.]

Corbin + Daddy = Love

2011-03-31T19:59:00.000-06:00

... and Nonni, too!

2011-03-28T09:43:00.002-06:00

A Boy and His Pop-Pop

2011-03-26T21:57:00.001-06:00

It's time to eat, eat, eat, what a treat!

2011-03-25T07:59:00.000-06:00

Corbin's first foray into the world of cheerios was a wild success. He's been such a good eater out here!

Nom Nom

2011-03-22T15:51:00.000-06:00

So fresh and so clean!

2011-03-20T13:39:00.000-06:00

Want OUT!

2011-03-19T23:15:00.000-06:00

9 months

2011-03-13T23:21:00.001-06:00

It's been a rough month. But that's ok, because guess what? Corbin is

9 months! Wow! He has now been out longer than he's been in. What a big boy.

Corbin is:

23 lbs (88%)

31 inches (99%)

Firmly in the realm of 12-18m shirts, and 9-12m pants

Thoroughly crawling, and pulling himself up to stand

Holding his own bottles (finally!!)

He's just getting 4 teeth on top, which means he is QUITE the pill lately.

He no longer enjoys going on the changing table, but he does still like being naked. He just gets too hot too quickly. In fact, I don't think he's worn a real coat all winter. Definitely takes after his dad there.

He's eating solid foods 2-3 times a day (depending on if mommy or daddy is feeding him), and is much more tolerant of them

Foods Corbin has tried so far:

Green beans, peas, squash, sweet potato, banana, apple sauce, pears

quesadilla

sweet chili/cheddar Quaker rice snacks

french fries

bread

string cheese

kix

I think Corbin's favorites are still squash, and "sweet chili" Quaker rice snacks. These are the first ones he's ever eaten with any sort of eagerness, and although he's more tolerant of more foods lately, I think those are still the favorites. What a random kid.

He is a mover lately! It was an adventure trying to get him to sit still for his 9 month pictures. These are some of the outtakes:

And some other random favorites from the month:

You WISH you had a husband like mine...

2011-03-08T21:19:00.000-07:00

I almost cried today right in the middle of Costco. Actually, let's be honest here, tears literally filled my eyes. But I didn't let them fall. Much.

I've been pretty depressed lately. I'm not sure why, but it's been rough... but that's not the point of the story. I convinced Brit to go on a Costco run, not because we actually needed anything, just because I tend to enjoy browsing through Costco (and eating samples). We passed through the electronics first, and Brit convinced me to get another external hard drive. La la la, browsing through the rest of the store, until right at the end we pass by the little floral stand. "Aw, I want some flowers," I mention in passing. But the cheap ($9) bouquets were all... less than desirable. And the really good ones were $20, and that's more than I thought we could spend, especially considering I had updated Quicken just that morning and was still depressed over the results. After a few moments, Brit took his fancy 2 TB hard drive out of the cart, picked my favorite bouquet, and said "There- now we're saving money!"

And that's when I teared up. I love my husband.

The Best Things In Life

2011-02-16T10:21:00.001-07:00

He cracks me up.

another month

2011-02-02T10:01:00.000-07:00

Dang my kid is cute.

In case you were wondering, in the month of November, I took 24 pictures of my baby (plus about 40 during our family holidays in Colorado). In the month of January, I took about 220 pictures of my baby. I would say I'm enjoying my new toy.

Corbin's new developments:

~Scooting, barely, though in a sneaky way that we can't even tell for sure how he's doing it.

~Wearing some 12-18 month clothes (and 9-12, and the occasional 6-9 still)
~Got another tooth- that's 4 total, all on the bottom (huh?)

~Started solid foods, for real this time!

Funny story there. We had been "trying solids" since the end of November, and it was always a traumatizing experience. After Corbin got sick last month, we took a little break, and tried again after about a week when he was feeling better. All of a sudden, he decided he liked it! He will now eagerly chomp down rice cereal. He has also tried:

Peas (basically likes them now)

Sweet potatoes (he's slowly getting into it)

Applesauce (gags every time)

Bananas (he likes chomping on the end of mommy's banana, but gets a "face" when he actually gets a piece in his mouth)

Usually it takes at least 20 good sessions for him to start liking (or getting used to) a flavor. This is one picky kid!!!

~Corbin Loves~

Going out, still. He can go from fussing in the car to bouncing happily in the shopping cart within 2 minutes.

Making funny faces!

Pulling hair

His binky and blanket

Plastic bags

Squealing

Grabbing at Mommy's camera

We got a highchair!

2011-02-02T00:32:00.000-07:00

After about the... fifth time Corbin fell out of his bumbo seat on top of the table (don't worry- he only almost fell off the table once. I am an awesome mom) I finally broke down and got a highchair. It makes this feeding process SO.MUCH.BETTER. Why didn't I do this sooner??

My new baby!

2011-01-13T01:16:00.002-07:00

This is my precious:

These are my accessories:

This is my #1 wishlist item:

And this, dear friends, is the blog I created to practice my photography skillz. I'm posting a photo a day (so far as you know, anyway) to just practice taking and sharing pictures. Take a look. Hopefully, it will get better with age.

Project 365

I do so love this photography deal. I find myself looking forward to every event through the mindset of "Ooh! Just think of the pictures I can take!!" I'm pretty pleased with myself.

The Plague

2011-01-11T17:40:00.000-07:00

It took Corbin 7 months to get really, truly sick. I think that's pretty good, for having a mom who works in the hospital and brings home all kinds of scary germs! He had a cough, fevers, ear infection, and I'm about 80% sure he had croup.

The best part: Thursday night I had to go back to work. Halfway through getting report, I get a text message from Brit saying "at what temperature should I be worried and call somebody?" ::headdesk:: You can't just leave it at that!!! I was freaking out. Turns out he had a fever of 102 (under the arm), so he got bundled up and taken to the on-call pediatrician (so glad we have one of those!!). They found the ear infection there and sent him home on antibiotics. Crisis averted, and he didn't have to go to the hospital. I really need to remember that not every sick kid goes to the hospital....

Still, my stethoscope got a lot of use for that week.

Poor, sick Biscuit....

Halfway through Corbin's week, Brit got sick, too. Poor baby. Especially since it was while I was still in the middle of my work week...

On my way home from work one morning, I was thinking "Oh man, I am so lucky that I have such a strong immune system from working in the hospital!" Famous last words. I woke up that night with a lump in my throat, and the next day I was downed by a low-grade fever. Shivering under two down comforters and a dog. Love fevers.

Those are my eyes in there...

Everyone is all better now. But it was a rough couple weeks.

Seven!

2011-01-08T11:12:00.001-07:00

Can you believe how big this kid is getting?

22.2 lbs (91%)

Size 4 diapers

9-12m clothes, though we still squeeze him into some 6-9, especially jammies (mostly because we don't have enough clothes that fit him!)

Sleeping from 8pm-7:30am

Mastered rolling over and sitting up

Sprouted a new bottom (??) tooth

Started reaching for me♥♥

Corbin LOVES:

Hanging on to my necklace and leaning back

Grabbing/pulling/eating my jacket/sweatshirt strings

Bath time

Saying "Ha! Ha! Ha!" (although he stopped this recently for some reason...) and "mamamama"

Sucking/chewing on his top lip

(in hindsight, this might have been a reaction to his tooth coming in, as this is another thing he stopped doing around the middle of the month)

Playing with Chess

Baby signing time [shudder]

Making noise

Squealing while breathing in

Making big messes

(note to self: don't leave the baby alone with the cereal bowl in reach.... My bad.)

Getting out and going places

Sitting in the shopping cart like a big boy

Corbin HATES:

Anything to do with solid foods, unless it's mommy's food

Being forced to play alone by himself on the floor while mommy and daddy do interesting things on the computer

Being forced to wear his stinking cute hat

Love this kid!!

Happy Not A Father's Day!

2010-12-16T23:22:00.000-07:00

I only work 3 days (well, nights) a week, but for some reason it feels like I have been working ALL THE TIME lately. Probably because we recently got back from Colorado, then I immediately had to work my 3 shifts, then my shifts were split up. So it would be work... sleep all day because I just worked.... sleep all afternoon because I work that night... sleep all day because I just worked... etc. There was a lot of working and sleeping. Which means there was also a lot of Brit taking care of Corbin all by himself, and Corbin is at the SUPER FUN age where if you're not actively entertaining him, he's fussy. And 6 or so hours into the day with one 30 minute nap, he's often fussy even when you're actively entertaining him.

It's been a little stressful.

So I finally had a couple of days off, and I dubbed Tuesday "Not A Father's Day." I woke up with Corbin, fed him, walked him and the dog, then packed him up in the car with a couple of bottles and headed out for the day. I wanted Brit to have the whole day ENTIRELY TO HIMSELF, without hearing or dealing with a crying baby. We visited my grandpa, drove around a lot trying to get him to sleep, did a little shopping, went to the gym (Corbin did GREAT in the Kids Club for his first time, the workers there were totally charmed), and got home just in time for his last meal and bedtime.

I think Brit spent the day throwing up.

So we did it again on Wednesday, so Brit could actually enjoy the day, but this time we mostly stayed at home- just out of Daddy's way. Tuesday night, Corbin couldn't focus on his last bottle, because he could see Daddy right there and was apparently amazed that he was still alive. I guess he loves best whomever he sees the least.

I think over the course of 48 hours, Brit feels somewhat rejuvenated, and ready to take on the crying baby once again. And Corbin has a slightly increased chance of survival while I'm working.

Eyes

2010-12-15T22:18:00.000-07:00

Do you think it's weird, in all these monthly updates, I've never mentioned what color Corbin's eyes have turned?

That's because, I'll be completely honest here, I DON'T KNOW! They seem to change color every time I look at them. What do you think? Brown? Green? Brownish-green? Bluish maybe? They seem bluish sometimes, to me.

Maybe I'll call it hazel.

Christensen Thanksgiving/Christmas Holiday Extravaganza

2010-12-14T10:05:00.000-07:00

Brit's family had a holiday tradition going long before I joined on as a Christensen, and that's to get the whole family together every other holiday- Thanksgiving on even years, Christmas on odd years. This works out with my career, seeing as how I have to work every other holiday anyway. I'm a little sad that I never get to see my family for thanksgiving or christmas, but seeing the in-laws is still TONS of fun.

This year was a Thanksgiving year, and we've started combining it with Christmas and getting it all done in one weekend. So me and Brit loaded up the car and headed out on Tuesday to spend more than a week in a house with 8 adults and 6 kids. It was cozy.

Thursday night was the traditional Thanksgiving dinner, full of good food, lists of things we are thankful for, and yams that immediately clogged the arteries.

Brit and I were in charge of mashing the potatoes. There was a failure in communication somewhere down the line, and nobody told us the 20lb bag of potatoes was supposed to be HALF for mashing, half for baking later that weekend. So we had a lot of mashed potatoes, and poor Brit had a potato-peeling workout.

Friday we had Christmas Eve, set up the Christmas decorations all over the house, and took a lot of family pictures. We try to do this every year we get together. Brit's family is very lucky to be all together so often... I'm pretty sure the last time we got a family picture on my side was in 2006.

Saturday we had Christmas, and the feeling was so total and authentic, several people thought stores would be closed on Saturday. We totally forgot it wasn't REALLY Christmas! The celebration was fantastic, even with so many little kids around. I've decided that Christmas is very hard on little kids... watching your cousins open gifts and get new things while you have to wait around five whole minutes for your turn. Pure torture. Corbin did pretty well, although he had to go down for a nap partway through. I think his biggest present (in my mind, anyway) is the blanket I made for him.

He LOVED IT! He actually smiled when he felt it! And now it's by his side for every nap time. I definitely was not expecting such a "strong" reaction (for a 6 month old, anyway).

The rest of the week involved a lot of Settlers of Catan for Brit and his brothers, and a lot of learning Photoshop for me. Corbin did pretty well, once we figured out that he can't handle too much chaos (is anyone surprised?) and needs a chance to wind down before his naps.

I was REALLY sad to have to come back to Utah, and not ready at all to leave. I'm so lucky to have such wonderful in-laws that they feel like my own family.

Pictures taken by my talented sister-in-law, Heather.

Shutter Bug

2010-12-07T10:16:00.000-07:00

I have a new obsession, going on about one whole week now. I've decided I want to become a "professional" photographer. It started in Colorado, watching my amazing sister-in-law line up professional looking photos with her not-professional (though still pretty awesome) camera. I wanted to learn how to do that! It expanded while watching some family work with Photoshop. I decided I wanted to learn photoshop, too. I became obsessed. I read instructions online, I found tutorial videos, I spent every moment of free time (and some of not-free-time) learning all I could.

I've always been a little bit interested in photography. I used to think myself the photographer of the family, the one who got the "good shots" of the kids. Looking back now, I realize they're pretty terrible, but still- it's something that when I do well (or think I've done well), I'm very proud of myself. I also used my rudimentary knowledge of photoshop to spiff up some family pictures in Colorado. Let's be honest, it wasn't very good, but oh how I preened. I love it.

Now, there's something you need to know about my personality. I can be very stubborn. VERY stubborn. When I decide I want something, I obsess over it. I can't think of anything else. And I make everyone around me miserable until I get what I want. There is no such thing as patiently waiting for the right time when it comes to my obsessions.

So after over a week of pestering, Brit finally caved and let me drop a TON of money on an entry-level professional camera. (Let's not get into how much, exactly.)

Now don't tell him, but I'm suddenly very nervous. Yay, I got what I want, but.... what if I don't like it? What if I dutifully take pictures for a few weeks, and decide I hate it? Or, more likely, I'm terrible at it? It's a little late now, but I do wish I could figure out how to have these doubts BEFORE I spend the money. Somehow, that part of my conscience is always on vacation until it's too late...

Sweet lullabies...

2010-12-02T13:51:00.000-07:00

I just made a lullaby CD for Corbin to play in the car when he gets tired and grumpy. Songs include:

Bleed It Out : by Linkin Park
Headstrong : by Trapt
Savior : by Rise Against
You're Gonna Go Far, Kid : by The Offspring
Teenagers : by My Chemical Romance
...among others.

And in case you were wondering, yes, it does work. Less the normal margin of error when you're dealing with babies and little kids, playing this kind of music (as loud as possible) almost always calms him down and puts him to sleep. I also just got a new rear-view mirror for watching him in his carseat while I'm driving, and today I watched him go from mid-cry, to thoughtful, to falling soundly asleep in the middle of "No More Sorrow." It still makes me laugh, and I've known this for a few months now.

6 month update is forthcoming, but I haven't even done the pictures yet, and I'm working this weekend. So it will be a while.

half a year!!

2010-12-01T17:48:00.001-07:00

Corbin is SIX MONTHS OLD! I can't believe it's been half a year already. It's hard for me to think of things to write each month, for some reason I just don't think he changes much from month to month. But looking back over the last 6 months, I am completely amazed at how much he's learned. That's my favorite part of being a parent, I think. I love watching him figure out the world around him. I know every baby does this, but it was the most amazing thing in the world when he learned how to control his movements and reach for toys. And he was the smartest baby ever when he started learning cause/effect to make his toys do fun things. I just love watching him become more aware, learn who I am, and turn into a "real boy."

And now he is...

SIX MONTHS OLD

This month...

-20 lbs (92%), and 29 inches (99%)

-Wearing size 3 diapers, but really should be in size 4

-Somewhere between 9m and 12m size clothes, moving quickly toward 12m (above picture is 12m clothes)

-Sleeping (generally) from 8pm to 7am, sometimes still waking up at 5 for an extra bottle

-Started solid foods!!

We went to Colorado for Thanksgiving/Christmas with the family. After thanksgiving dinner, Nonni helped Corbin try out his first bowl of rice cereal. He was not amused.

Also while in Colorado, Corbin rolled over for (essentially) the first time. He did it once before, front-to-back, several months ago... but then never did it again. Until he was playing by himself in the corner, and I went to check on him, and he was on his stomach! Poor kid, a huge step and nobody even saw it.

He started sitting up more on his own. He still falls over rather easily, but he can balance pretty well for short periods of time.

He's just growing up so much, in ways that I can't even pinpoint to describe in a blog. He loves his momma, he loves grabbing things (like his cousin's hand! and my hair...), he's not a fan of chaos, and he still adores being naked. He's also very, very wiggly... constantly waving his arms around and kicking. It makes it very hard to cut his nails, but it sure is cute.

Corbin and Kiara, Natalie's baby

With cousin LE- it was so much fun to have two little babies around!

He loves his Nonni!!

"Christmas" day, with the blanket I made for him

Corbin is 5 months old..... and 10 days

2010-11-10T10:52:00.001-07:00

Ok, so I'm a little late. But only a little bit.

This month:

Corbin is 20 lbs and 27 inches, according to my own inaccurate measurement.

He's in size 3 diapers, size 4 at night, and eating about 8 oz 4 times a day. He goes to bed at 8:30, and wakes up at 7. I'm still trying to push that back to 8.

He learned about cause/effect this month- he figured out that when he pulls on his ducky toy, it vibrates and makes a fun noise. When he pulls on the rattle ring on his bouncy seat, it comes off and he can play with it. And he does these things over and over again.

He found his toes. It makes me laugh every time I put him down on the changing table.

He got teeth! Teething has been rough, and sometimes it feels like it's still not over, but he now has two adorable bottom teeth.

Technically from this month, but just the other day, Brit turned to me and said "From now on, Corbin will be referred to as Biscuit." Don't ask me why. I love it.

He has recently become a Binky Baby. Since he was about 1-2 months old, he would ONLY take a binky as part of his naptime routine, and would spit it out as soon as he was in bed. If you tried to give it to him any other time, he's spit it out within about 20 seconds. In the last few weeks, he'll keep in a binky for 20 minutes or more. He doesn't really cry for it, but I like that he'll take it. Binkies are cute.

This is what I usually find at the end of a nap:

Halloween

2010-11-09T21:53:00.000-07:00

Cuteness Abounds

2010-10-11T20:56:00.001-06:00

I've decided that this age (4 months) is definitely my favorite. Everything Corbin does just floors me with cuteness. I want to love and snuggle him all the time, and find myself laughing 50 times a day at the adorable things he does. It's not even something that I can adequately express in pictures. He's just at an age where he's starting to be SO much more aware of the world around him. He has these great facial expressions. Practically every time you look at him, he breaks out in this huge, heart-breaking grin, and looks away all coy. He's grabbing at my face and my necklace, and snuggling into my shoulder when I hold him. He's big enough to hold on my hip, and to pull up to standing by his arms. He cracks up at everything- standing up, lifting his arms above his head, tickling his ribs, kissing his neck. He recognizes me and Brit and lights up whenever he sees us. He sits and babbles at us constantly. He freaks out with excitement every time his clothes come off. This kid LOVES to be naked! He is so funny. I can't believe how much I adore him. Sometimes I look at his tiny baby pictures and miss his itty bitty-ness, but not enough to want to go back. I'm having too much fun. Can I please freeze him right here and never let him grow up?

4 Months!

2010-10-03T21:19:00.000-06:00

I was a bad mom this month. I didn't take many pictures, and I haven't even finished the 3 month scrapbook page!

But that's ok. LOOK HOW CUTE HE IS!

Nothing much has changed this month. Still 16 lbs, 13 oz (85%), and 26 in (64%).

He's been sick a couple times this month, which is new. I think his poor little immune system is having a hard time with Mommy going back to work.

He's also regressed on sleeping through the night- he'll often wake up at 3 or 4 AM lately. That's still at least 7 hours, which is good, but 11 hours was BETTER. So we're trying to tweak the schedule again, and see what works. Can't kids just stay the same? Do they really have to keep growing all the time?

I can get him to laugh semi-regularly now. He especially loves being "thrown" up in the air (I never let go of him, but I hold him up high and bring him down toward my face, and he cracks up!)

He's right in the beginning stages of learning how to sit. If we lean him back too far, he'll clench his stomach muscles to try and pull himself up. He likes to be up looking around, but if he's sitting up TOO far unsupported he still tips right over and folds in half. He's working on it.

The funniest thing I've discovered this month:
Sometimes when I'm driving him around, he'll get sick of being in the car and start fussing. For a while, I started turning off my audiobook when that happened and turning up some loud music to drown him out (I'm a great mom, right?). I realized after doing this a few times that he would actually STOP fussing when I did that. So I would think, ok, he's done, I can go back to my book.... and he would start fussing again. So apparently, the most soothing thing for my son when he's fussy in the car is loud, angry music. Who is this kid, anyway?

SMASHBURGER!

2010-09-14T15:52:00.000-06:00

(In my head, that title was said in a Hulk voice.)

I finally tried Smashburger today. I don't know where I heard about it, but I think I've heard good things. With so many choices around me, though (Five Guys, JCW's, In N Out) I've never had the chance or motivation to try it. I finally did, and the verdict:

Meh, 'sOkay.

The rosemary garlic fries were GREAT, and I might go again just for those. The shake was pretty good, but really expensive, and JCW has more options. I had chicken, so I don't know how the burgers were, but I was a teensy bit annoyed that fancy extra toppings were all 99 cents extra. I like the "one price for a burger, then add whatever you want" approach of Five Guys. Also, I felt pretty ridiculous ordering Smashchicken, with Smashfries, while my mother-in-law had a Smashsalad... why do you feel the need to put your name on everything? We're not Smurfs.

I'm glad I went. But I probably won't go again. Except maybe for the fries.

3 Months!

2010-09-03T22:42:00.000-06:00

My baby is 3 months old already. Time flies by so fast when I'm working 3 days a week. And I'm not sure I like it. I feel like I'm missing out on a lot!

Corbin at 3 Months:

15 lbs, 26 in. (according to my own measurements, since he didn't have a doctor's appointment this month)

Still smiling all the time. I love getting home from work, or going in when he wakes up from a nap, and watching his face light up when he sees me.

Getting much more coordinated. He is starting to figure out how to reach out and grab things, and likes to hang on to our necklaces (or my hair) for dear life.

Focusing on things for long periods of time. He will watch a full 45-minute TV show with us. I hope I'm not creating a couch potato... but I doubt I have much of a choice in the matter.

We've started singing to him more... or rather, I've started singing to him more, and Brit has conceded to making a song part of the bedtime routine. Some of his favorites:

It's A Big World (my bedtime song of choice)

(yes, I realize that Corbin doesn't really have "favorites" at this point, and they're all MY favorites to sing to him... but I swear he smiles more when I sing him Code Monkey and the Alphabet Love Song.)

In just the last few weeks of Corbin's 3rd month, he started doing a couple of really spectacular things:

-He laughs! It's still a very rare treat, and mostly happens first thing in the morning when he's happiest, and when he's on his changing table (go figure). I have yet to capture it on video, usually because I'm the only one awake when it happens. Brit still doesn't believe me that he laughs at all.

-He's started SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT!!! We put him to bed at 9 or a little after, and he sleeps until 7 or 8. He has a crazy internal body clock that wakes him up at 7 am exactly, and we're trying to trick him into pushing that back an hour, but we're having little success so far. But we're not giving up. Still, the extra sleep is nice.

I like this kid kindof a lot. Sorry my blog has gone into boring mommy-mode, but I feel like there is literally nothing else interesting in my life right now besides my little guy.

Corbin's blessing day

The awesome guys who participated in Corbin's blessing

We've started letting Chess and Corbin interact a little more. She doesn't quite know what to do with it.

I'm a bad mom!

2010-08-13T10:01:00.000-06:00

Corbin will need therapy some day because I never blogged his monthly milestones. I didn't even start doing "watch me grow" pictures until his 2nd month. Basically, I'm just copying my sister-in-law in everything I do (she just posted her girl's 1 month post, and it reminded me). I am trying to keep a digital scrapbook, someday to be printed into a real scrapbook. Does that make up for it?

Corbin at 2 Months:

...12 lbs 13 oz, 77th percentile (up from 46)

...25 in. long, 95th percentile (up from 86)

...smiles regularly and easily, especially in the morning and after eating

...is a very happy, content baby- if he cries, it's because he needs to eat or go down for a nap. Very easy to figure out.

...is sleeping for 5 hours stretches at night.

...is starting to coo, gurgle, and talk. His favorite word is "goo."

...has cleared up his crazy baby acne.

...absolutely loves to spit up on daddy, and smile big like he just did something fantastic.

...is just meeting his cousins from my side, and seriously adores them. They can always make him smile.

...is fantastic at playing by himself.

...likes playing peek-a-boo.

...is ticklish on his feet.

...only falls asleep after he buries his face into your arm, and then usually tries to bury his face into something in his crib. But for some reason, a blanket or burp cloth laid over the eyes is unacceptable.

...loves bed time, and will easily fall asleep and stay asleep. Unfortunately, he's pretty obviously a morning person, because he will also wake up bright and early, and sometimes talk to himself in his crib for a while before he starts crying. Not a good sign for his night-owl parents.

Some other fun pictures from the second month:

This is Bree and JoAnn Righetti (holding Corbin). JoAnn Righetti is a loud, flamboyant, classic Italian from New Jersey, and Corbin loves her. My little Jersey Boy.

My life is pretty good.

2010-08-10T08:42:00.000-06:00

I like my kids to be able to entertain themselves. This is an important skill in my mind, so every day Corbin spends a little while chilling by himself, without mommy or daddy in his face keeping him happy. Yesterday, after about 10 minutes of alone time on our bed just watching the ceiling fan, I put a perfectly content baby down for a nap. He woke up early, so after changing his diaper, I put him back to bed to finish out his regular nap time. Twenty minutes later, he still hasn't cried, so I peek in on him to make sure he's asleep... and find him staring at the ceiling, kicking and waving his arms, just talking to himself.

I seriously have the best baby in the entire world.

Highlights

2010-07-22T21:31:00.000-06:00

Two things I forgot about our trip to CO:

1. We discovered just how long Corbin can cry without stopping when he's DONE with being in the car. It's a very, very long time.

2. I felt like a mommy for the first time. Usually it's just me and Brit comforting Corbin, so I have nothing to make me think he "knows" us, because he's never had to deal with strangers. On our first day out there, Nonni was holding him and trying to comfort him and let me eat, but Corbin wasn't having any of it. I finally went in and took him from her, and he immediately calmed down once he was in my arms. He knows me! And better than that, he LIKES me! I'm not super excited about the clingy, mommy-only phase of childhood, but it's nice to be needed right now. I'm a mommy!!

(BTW, by the end of the week, I'm pretty sure he liked Nonni better than me....)

Happy Memories

2010-07-22T12:12:00.000-06:00

Corbin has been so good lately. He's going down for naps regularly, going to bed as soon as I put him down without a fuss, being happy and smiley while he's awake... with just one VERY notable exception. He's been waking up every single morning 1-1.5 hrs before his designated wakeup time. Yesterday I finally gave in and adjusted his wakeup time an hour earlier... and then this morning he wakes up 1.5 hours before THAT. I can't win. I am very, very frustrated.

It's time for some happy memories.

Last week we got back from a nice long vacation in Colorado. Since I'm not working yet and Brit's done with school, I thought it would be the perfect chance to visit family, while we don't have any pressing time concerns! It was sooo much fun. I love seeing Brit's family. We went out for a belated anniversary celebration while Nonni and PopPop watched Corbin. I figured out that breastfeeding wasn't filling him up enough, and we switched to formula (he is SO much happier now!). Corbin started smiling regularly. And I took several blissful naps. I love my in-laws! I wish we didn't have to come home. Eventually, I plan on living out there.

Highlights of the week:
~Dinners at the park with the kids
~Going to the dog park with Chess and Corbin
~Date night to see Eclipse and eat at Carrabba's
~Making strawberry jam
~Eating anything I want and gaining 10 lbs (maybe that last part isn't SO much a highlight...)
~Visiting Brit's friends for 4th of July
~Watching fireworks all across the city from the deck
~Letting Nonni take Corbin at 7 am and SLEEPING IN!
~Watching the little kids try boss Chess around ("Chest! No!")
~Corbin's first real submerssive bath
~Getting Corbin to smile at every possible moment

A Post About Poop

2010-07-17T16:11:00.000-06:00

Well, we just got through our first Poop Crisis of parenthood. I was holding Corbin, feeding him, noticing that he smelled like he had a messy diaper. When he wasn't eating real well, I took a break to check it out.... and looked down to find neon-green poo all down his leg, on his blanket, and ON MY SHIRT.

Hilarity ensued.

I handed him to Brit, who carried him up to the bathroom as far away from bodily contact as humanly possible. I filled the sink while we passed him back and forth, trying to get his poopy clothes off and into the bathtub without getting any of it on us. Corbin was not amused. Brit somehow succeeded in staying poop-free, I managed to get it on each layer of clothing as they came off. Perhaps I should have waited to remove the shirt until AFTER we were done. Lesson learned. We plopped naked poopy baby in a full sink of water, which promptly turned disgusting. And because poopy water wasn't bad enough, he decided to pee in it too. Thanks, Corbin. At that point, I gave up and got in the shower with him. He was even less amused. But at least we both got clean.

All our clothes are in the washer, the bathtub and sink are sanitized, and Corbin is clean, dressed, and fed.

Poop crisis averted. I think we earned a gold star in parenting today. So sorry I didn't stop in the middle of it to take pictures. (Not that the thought didn't occur to me.)

Wordless.... Thursday?

2010-07-08T13:44:00.000-06:00

Angry Birthmom Vent

2010-06-30T21:49:00.000-06:00

I love the show "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant." It's a guilty pleasure. But it's making me MAD tonight. I'm going through the marathon recorded on my DVR, and I've seen several episodes now where a single mom is thinking about "giving up" for adoption. But after she sees the baby for the first time, the narrator intones something to the effect of "he was so precious, she knew she could never give him up."

So.... what? Isabelle wasn't precious enough for me to subject her to the life of an unprepared single mom? Maybe I didn't love her enough? Apparently she was a subpar child, and it was was just easy for me to hand her off and move on. Good thing I didn't have a beautiful or precious child like these women. Good thing I have a heart of stone and didn't REALLY love my baby.

Ugh.

Just.... UGH.

/rant

Babywise: My thoughts

2010-06-27T21:33:00.000-06:00

A friend recommended the book Babywise when I was very newly pregnant, and I managed to just barely get it (mostly) read before I had the baby. I've heard that it's controversial and extreme, but I didn't see that at all in what I read. It made perfect sense.

Haha, little did I know...

I still like the idea, and I'm still incorporating a modified version, but I see now how it can be "extreme." Babies don't conform to your schedule!! I started out trying to follow the book to the letter, and found supporting information online to further educate myself. According to all the reading, I should be having a regular wake up time every morning, within 15 minutes either direction. From that point, he should eat at the same times every day, every 2 - 3 hours. After eating, he should be awake for some time (no more than an hour, according to the people online who have done this before), then be put down for naps while still awake and fall asleep on his own.

The first issue I discovered in practice is, if he is eating every 2-3 hours (with one 4 hour stretch a day, according to the lactation people), how is it mathematically possible to have the same eating times every day??? It is not. So our schedule fluctuates a bit day to day, but in general we start our day at 10 AM. If he eats well, he is predictably hungry every 3 hours, and I can basically tell you when I'll be feeding him from day to day. If he's growing or something, he'll get hungry in 1.5-2 hours, and that's ok- I'll feed him then. If he's hungry because he was dicking around instead of eating, I'll make him wait and get properly hungry before feeding him again. If he's sleeping past 3 hours, then I'll wake him up to eat (if he's gonna have a 4 hour stretch, it's gonna be at night, thankyouverymuch). And this basically works for us.

And then there's the napping thing. This has been our biggest issue. The online reading says babies have "sleep cues" that you have to read and know when to put them down, and you have about a 10 minute window to get it right or they get overtired and won't fall asleep. Seriously?? First of all, I've known this person for less than a month, and he can't talk... how in the heck am I supposed to know what his sleep cues are? And babies are changing constantly. By the time I get to know him and figure out his sleep cues, they could have changed entirely. So we've never had success with putting him down and having him fall asleep on his own. I've given up on that, and I'm ok with it. We'll hold him and rock him to sleep and let him dictate his own sleep schedule, and maybe he'll be able to teach me what he needs/wants before he's 6 months old.

So things are going pretty well now. He's figured out how to eat without TOO much trouble, most of the time... and he's very good at sticking to his "schedule," most of the time.... and he's VERY good at sleeping at night. Most of the time. He's had a rough few days, but last night he slept for almost 5 hours in one stretch. Coincidentally, I've been happier and more relaxed today than I have been in a long time.

I'm sure next week I'll have something else making me pull my hair out in frustration.

But at least next week we'll hopefully be in Colorado where Noni and Papa will make everything all better.

Testing....

2010-06-25T23:12:00.000-06:00

Apparently, blogger has a new upload tool.

Also, my family is cute.

true friends

2010-06-25T21:39:00.002-06:00

Wednesday afternoon I got a text from my very good friend Shayla basically telling me to come over tomorrow (Thursday) and let her make me lunch and hang out for a while. Well who am I to say no to that? So yesterday, after waking up and feeding the baby, I packed up and headed over to her house in my pajamas. I spent the day laying on the couch, watching silly TV, talking about anything and nothing, and being fed. Cookies were made, my baby was held, and it was basically the best day I've had in several weeks. There is just something so relaxing to me about NOT being in my house. Even though I'm not doing anything lately, there is an unconscious feeling in the back of my head saying "you SHOULD be folding the laundry... doing the dishes... paying the bills... etc etc." Also, she is just one of those people that I have a natural connection with, in that we can pick up anytime and talk about anything. There is not such thing as an awkward silence with us. (Of course, Corbin was an angel and slept the ENTIRE DAY. And he's been making up for it this past 24 hours.)

I'll have to do that again soon. It was sooo relaxing. I don't think she realized what she was getting herself into...

I'm so grateful for the amazing helpful people in my life! I would go crazy without you!

Let me count the ways....

2010-06-23T12:29:00.003-06:00

I hate breastfeeding. I can list a million reasons to not continue, but the health benefits still weigh pretty heavy, and when it comes right down to it, switching to formula is really expensive. But seriously, I hate it.

It's a fight every single time lately. If I'm not fighting to keep him awake, then I'm fighting to get him to eat at all. Lately he's taken to sucking a few times, then pushing back and fussing, like it tastes gross or something. (Granted, breastmilk isn't the loveliest tasting thing in the world, but he's not supposed to know that yet!) So feeding him now takes all of my concentration and two hands, so forget being able to hold a book or actually do something interesting during this 30 minute ordeal.

I can't drink soda anymore. At least, that's what I think is giving him constant gas pains. I know, I know, soda isn't that good for me anyway, but you know what? I like it. A lot. And I'm going to miss having it for an entire year. I hate the whole concept of basing my diet around what makes him uncomfortable. If it turns out he's sensitive to dairy, like many babies are, then that will be a breaking point for me... no way am I giving up milk for anyone.

I hate the fact that I can never get a full stretch of sleep anymore. If I'm not waking up to feed him, (like last night when my sweet well-intentioned husband gave him a few bottles so I could sleep longer) then I at least have to wake up and pump or risk the pain of engorgement and/or dwindling my supply.

And who ever said that this is more convenient than bottles? Yeah, it's always there and always the right temperature, but if my son is screaming in the middle of a grocery shopping trip because he's hungry, I can whip out a bottle and feed him without really stopping. I think it might make people uncomfortable if I did the same with my breast.

I try to pump so I can give him SOME bottles, but it takes an entire day of pumping to build up one bottle's worth of supply. That just feels discouragingly useless.

And then there's the classic gripes of "it hurts," "it's messy," "it stains my clothes," etc etc etc.

BUT, I know it's the best thing for him. Though to be honest, if somebody gave me a free year's supply of formula right now, I wouldn't miss a beat in switching him over.

It DOES get better........ right?

Unoriginal

2010-06-20T20:16:00.004-06:00

Guess what? It's father's day. I bet you couldn't guess from the other posts in your reader.

I know it's all over the place, but I would be negligent if I didn't take a second to recognize the new daddy in the house today. He is amazing. His patient and calm demeanor is exactly what I need to balance my crazy high-stress attitude. Any time I'm losing it, usually because of problems with nursing, Brit has no problem taking Corbin and calming him down and letting me relax. He takes the baby any time he won't sleep at night to let me get rest between feedings. And he's basically the cutest daddy ever. I just love watching them together.

Happy father's day, Brit!

Being a mom is hard.

2010-06-09T11:39:00.003-06:00

And breastfeeding basically sucks.

=====================================

Still worth it.

2010-06-02T09:40:00.005-06:00

My baby is the cutest baby ever in the whole wide world. Except for maybe this one. She gives him some stiff competition, at least.

I keep wanting to go back and downplay my birth story and tell you it wasn't that bad. But let's be honest, it was traumatizing. I'm just a gigantic wimp or something, I guess. I also half-heartedly apologize for the ridiculously long post full of details, but I'm glad I recorded for my memories, so I'm not really that sorry.

My grumpy monkey is not so grumpy, as it turns out. He had a rough first day, but really, can you blame him? The nurse in the morning pointed out that maybe he had a headache that night. Um.... right. I guess that is a distinct possibility. Duh, me. He's been pretty easy-going for the last 24 hours or so. VERY stubborn, though. He's great at eating when HE wants to eat, and heaven help you if you try to make him eat sooner than that. And that's just the tip of the stubborn iceberg.

I kinda like him.

These are my cute nurses- Above is yesterday's nurse, Marianne, who I spent the day chatting with about life and jobs and such. Below is my awesome labor nurse, Taelor, who was very comforting and supportive when things got rough.

A Baby Story

2010-05-31T21:44:00.004-06:00

[This post will be full of TMI. You have been warned.]

[Also, it's super long. Sorry. I'll post a short version at the end if you want to skip to that.]

I feel a little weird for posting a birth story 4 hours after birth, like maybe I should still be exhausted and wait a few days... But honestly, I feel great NOW, the baby's sleeping, and I don't really wanna wait until after he keeps me up all night.

He is a grumpy monkey.

So to start at the way-back beginning, I've been frustrated for weeks at my lack of labor, and seriously considered posting a vent about it. How does one get to 4+ and 80% and just stay there?? Turns out there was probably a reason for that.

So this morning (Monday) I woke up to pee as per usual, and was shockingly awake for 7:30 AM after going to bed at 2. After emptying my bladder and going back to bed, I still felt... well, trickly, to be honest, but that wasn't anything new. I decided to get up and check anyway. And realized on my way back to the bathroom that my water was quite thoroughly broken. I ate breakfast, finished packing the hospital bag, loaded the dishes so they wouldn't smell, and finished up a few other last-minute things. Two underwear changes and about 10 super- pads later, I decided I was DONE with standing and moving, I couldn't take the grossness anymore, so we left. I never expected to have my water spontaneously rupture... I thought that was pretty rare. And FYI, it's pretty dang gross. Had the experience, got the t-shirt, let's not do that again.

So I got admitted right away, no triage needed. Unfortunately, even with my water broken, my uterus wasn't doing ANYTHING. My contractions were unfeelable, and at least 10 minutes apart, often more. I tried walking... it helped a little, but still not really enough. So I started pitocin. I had to get up to 12-14 before my contractions started getting regular and uncomfortable, and I still wasn't dilating too quickly. I think I was up to 5 or 6 by that point. My midwife wanted to put in an internal contraction and heart rate monitor, and discovered that I had another membrane to rupture. So between her breaking that, and the literally 5 tries it took to get all the monitors in place, my cervix was good and irritated and things were MOVING. And hurting. And apparently Corbin was good and irritated too, because his heart rate started dropping with contractions, enough to scare them into giving me oxygen and calling the Doctor.

We hypothesized that the cord was probably around his neck (and that was probably the reason he'd been taking so long to move down, both pre-hospital and up to that point), and the doctor and midwife strongly encouraged me to get an epidural just in case we needed to go in for a C-section. If things got that bad and I didn't have an epidural, they would have had to do general anesthesia, and that's no fun. Well by that point I was hurting so bad I jumped right on board. But the anesthesiologist had to be called in, so it took a good 20-30 minutes for him to even get there. That was THE longest half hour of my ENTIRE life. I wanted to die. The contractions got to the point of completely unbearable, and I didn't feel like I had any break in between. The world completely lost focus for me. I couldn't move, couldn't reposition myself without help (I felt like I might as well have had an epidural for how little control I had over my legs), and I was just writhing and practically screaming and saying over and over "I can't do this, I can't do this."

The rest of the experience is a pretty big blur of pain. I know a ton of people came in the room... at some point around when the anesthesiologist got there, his heart went down to and stayed in the 70's... they kept telling me to arch my back or reposition and I kept having contractions and couldn't cooperate properly... at one point I think they checked me and I was complete, and they stopped trying to get an epidural and were trying for a spinal... and while he was stabbing around sending shooting tingling pains down my leg, I suddenly said "I have to push!" I don't even know if I really did or not. It all just hurt. I couldn't figure out how to push without screaming though, it took a minute to remember to hold my breath and tuck my chin and all that jazz, and still it was all a blur. I think I only pushed a few times, but I was so afraid I would have to push for hours. I would NOT be able to handle that. The midwife wasn't even the one doing the delivery, it was the doctor... and she had to use forceps to pull him out because of his scary heart rate and my ridiculous inability to cooperate and push properly.

Approximately an eternity later, they got him out, and I completely checked out. I couldn't even open my eyes to look at him when they laid him on my chest. I had no muscle tone left in my body, and they pumped Fentanyl through my IV which made me even more sleepy. I found out later that he was born at 5:50, he was 8 lbs 12 oz, and he had a cord wrapped fairly tight around his neck. After doing his vitals and whatnot, they wrapped him up and brought him over to see me before whisking him off to the nursery. His cap refill was a little slow, and with the rough birth and everything they just wanted to make sure he was ok. I couldn't raise my arms to hold him, and again I could barely focus or get my eyes open.

It took me a long time to wake up, or want to eat, or feel better at all. They brought him back close to 7 because he wanted to eat. He had a hard time figuring out what to do with it because he just wanted to cry. But he got a good meal.... and started crying again. Seriously, a grumpy monkey. But I guess he's had a hard day. They took him back, I got a good nap, and just barely got all cleaned up and refreshed.

So NOW, I feel great. It's so good to be clean. And awake. And eating. But seriously, I am never ever ever trying to go natural again.

Think it's worth it? :)

The short version:

My water broke at about 7:30 AM. We got to the hospital at 9-ish, had very slow labor until...... I dunno, 3 or 4? After breaking another membrane and placing internal monitors, it picked up HARD, and I wanted to die. Corbin's heart rate started dropping, I tried to get an epidural but got to complete and pushing before they could place anything, and a few pushes and forceps later, Corbin was born at 5:50, 8 lbs 12 oz, with a cord around his neck. And I am never trying to go natural again.

Nursery!

2010-05-22T13:33:00.005-06:00

After attending a craft night this weekend, Baby's nursery is DONE. And cute. Except now he doesn't have a choice on his name, so he'd better come out looking like a Corbin.... Or at least a Birnoc.

PS- Big thanks to Shayla for helping me get the letters right. Crafting is not my thing.

Pictures, more baby, etc

2010-05-18T06:34:00.004-06:00

Guess whose camera magically reappeared last night?!?! It was the oddest thing. I swear we've looked there before.

Well, right before it went missing, I specifically took pictures to share of my 36 week belly, and my awesome new haircut/color. I was kinda hoping to debut the hair with my maternity pictures, but I think Wendy's pretty far behind on editing so I don't know when those will be available. So, unfortunately, the color is a bit faded and not as cool (as happens so quickly with bright pink), but here you are:

Holy crud my belly looks HUGE! I swear it doesn't look that big in person. At least not from my perspective.

So last night, I got closer than ever to going to the hospital (which you're gonna laugh at, because you probably wouldn't even blink an eye at this): my contractions got up to 10 minutes apart, and strong enough to make me go "Ow." I got super excited and started watching the clock religiously..... at which point they of course disappeared completely. Dangit!

"Nesting" is kicking in, but just in response to my frustration about still being pregnant. I can't sleep as well because my mind is racing, wondering/hoping SOMETHING will happen SOON, and so as a coping mechanism I'm keeping myself busy (and walking!) by cleaning the entire house and running errands. Even though I'm exhausted. Everything else is completely ready for baby, and I'm running out of things to do, which frightens me. I don't need more time to think!

Oh, and I almost forgot, a picture of my cute husband making me "breakfast in bed" on Mother's day:

I had to work Saturday night, so Brit woke up early to have breakfast ready for me when I got home. (Unfortunately it took me an unusually short amount of time to give report and get home, so it wasn't quite ready when I got there.... but that wasn't really a problem.) He made me pancakes and brought them to a sleepy me after I'd gotten in bed. It was soooooo nice. I sleep better if I eat first, anyway. I love my Britty. And this Father's day, he's gonna be a real dad! I'll have to think up something special for him.

Hypnobirthing: My thoughts

2010-05-17T08:37:00.002-06:00

I think I've mentioned that I'm planning on having this baby without an epidural. I didn't want to go into this completely unprepared, though, so after hearing some great reviews, I decided to read up a bit about hypnobirthing. I tried unsuccessfully to find a way to read the book without paying money, and eventually gave in and forked it out to Barnes & Noble. So I've been slowly working my way through the book over the last few weeks.

I think I agree with the general philosophy of Hypnobirthing. The idea of "tuning out" to the world and just relaxing through the contractions. At least, that's how I interpret the general philosophy of Hypnobirthing. I had to sift through a whole lot of hokey BS in first few chapters that just made me snort. Like insisting that they're not "contractions," they're "surges." Your water doesn't "break," it "releases." Just a lot of flower-power type stuff that isn't my cup of tea. But I figured that's not really the point, so I kept on reading.

Last night, I finally got to the nitty-gritty method section. At first it all sounded great. And then I reached my breaking point. Allow me to quote for you:

"Pushing can be counterproductive and actually slow down the birthing process... There has been much written about the inefficiency of forced pushing and the possible damaging effect it has on the muscles of the birthing woman's pelvic floor, but it remains a necessary part of emergence in the minds of many caregivers and women themselves... Often women themselves will speak of an overwhelming urge to push taking over. If this is felt, it is also because of conditioning that stems from a deeply embedded notion that babies cannot descend on their own."

Um, no. That's where I have to draw the line. I have NEVER met a woman who gave birth without drugs who DIDN'T feel relief by bearing down or pushing when it came to that point. I have never seen or heard of a woman in natural labor (not using this method, of course) that, when the baby starts crowning and the nurses say "Don't push! Don't push! We need to wait for the doctor!", doesn't respond with "ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!?!?!?"

The urge to push IS overwhelming. It is INSTINCT. It is working with your body to get the baby out. It is usually the only way to relieve the pain and feel better at that point. It has been seen and proven, over and over and over and over again. And a book that can honestly try to tell me otherwise is completely discredited in my mind. "Conditioning" my ass. Sure, they present another way to approach that stage of labor, and it works for many women. But don't tell me that pushing is "wrong." Just tell me there's another way.

So I give up on my hypnobirthing book. I desperately hope the store will still take it back so my money's not wasted. It was ridiculously expensive. Good luck to any out there who still want to use this method of natural childbirth, it's just seriously not my thing.

Baby Things

2010-05-12T11:07:00.003-06:00

I had a lot of things I wanted to update about, and a lot of pictures I wanted to share. Unfortunately, after taking a couple pictures of my cute husband making me "breakfast in bed" after work on mother's day, my camera has DISAPPEARED OFF THE FACE OF THE PLANET. I know exactly what I did with it- I set it on the kitchen counter. And now it is nowhere in the entire house. I am baffled, and more than a little annoyed.

Luckily, I already got the pictures of my baby shower onto my computer. So my shower was 2 1/2 weeks ago (I'm a little slow), and it was perfect. A lot more people showed up than I thought would, but it was still just the right amount for an intimate gathering. No silly shower games (no offense to those who like them, just not my thing), and we managed to keep up good conversation without the awkward silences I feared. I loved it. Yay for parties! Thanks again, Kari and Lanie!

And then of course there was the half a sheet cake left over that Brit and I managed to polish off in about a week and a half. We are so healthy.

***

In other baby-related news, I had my first "big" doctor's appointment yesterday. She was reluctant to check, but I made her do it anyway. And apparently, I'm already a 3 and 60% (I figure if you know what that means, it's not TMI. At least that's how it works in my twisted brain). She sent me on with strict admonishment to "take it easy," whatever that means, and said she doesn't want to see this baby until at least 38 weeks (I'm 36 now).

Yesterday morning, I was telling everyone who asked that I was "done" with being pregnant. My hips hurt, my feet are swollen, my poor legs get tired just supporting my fat self for any amount of time... I didn't really care if he did come 4 weeks early, I wanted out. After being faced with the reality of a baby possibly coming 4 weeks early, though, my attitude has rapidly and dramatically shifted. Now, I'm terrified of this kid coming out. I don't want him to be in a NICU when we go home. I don't even want them to take him away from me for "observation" for a few hours, as they did with Isabelle. I want a nice, normal delivery with a healthy baby who stays with me and nurses when he's ready. I'm not ready for this! And beyond even my worries about a healthy baby, I'm suddenly realizing that I'm terrified to start this journey into motherhood. Looking at our little bassinet as I was going to bed last night, I realized that in just a few short weeks, sleep would be a fond and distant memory. I'm not ready for that. Sure sleeping is hard with my belly so big, but at least he's not keeping me up for hours at a time screaming. And I highly doubt he's going to just be an "easy" baby.

So I'm crossing my legs and being as lazy as humanly possibly for at least the next two weeks. My snarky husband doubts that's even possible. And he's probably right. But I'll do my best. I don't care if I'm uncomfortable, I want a healthy baby.

Our New Baby!

2010-04-29T16:48:00.006-06:00

No, sorry, that one's still in the belly. But we have ANOTHER baby, thanks to our ludicrous tax return! Observe:

Ah, isn't it lovely?

Maybe I should elaborate.

We used part of our tax return to get a REAL media center. First picture is the small computer designed specifically to hook up to the TV, and be run from a remote. Second picture is the two terabyte (that's 2,000 gigabytes for the less tech savvy) network hard drive holding and streaming all of our more than three hundred [legally obtained and ripped for backup] movies. FINALLY in one usable, watchable place. And making the deal even sweeter is a program Brit found that organizes and catalogs all our movies and TV shows, as well as searching internet sites like Hulu for shows we don't have hard copies of. I think the coolest part is probably how it displays our movies.

It searches the IMDB database or something to display our movies by DVD cover art, with summaries and categories. And the ability to search by name or genre.

I'm in love.

Anyone wanna come over and watch a movie? We probably have it.

Whining about Whiners

2010-04-27T20:22:00.003-06:00

My husband says everything irritates me. That's probably true. And he's sick of hearing why I hate this and that... and it's too long to post on facebook... and I can't exactly rant on a forum about why the people on the forum bug me... So I turn to blogging.

The only forum I read is for pregnant moms due in June, so a vast majority of people on this forum are in the Baby Shower Stage. And holy CRIPES you should hear the whining!! Every time I go on I see another post about how annoyed someone is that her shower is only a week away, and her registry only has three things fulfilled! ZOMGTRAGEDY!!! What is with the sense of entitlement lately? Many, many, many people don't even get a shower. And most people who do, that I've seen anyway, take whatever people give them (usually clothes they didn't register for, from stores they've never been to) with a smile. I only registered in the first place to have a place to look and see everything I would need and how much it would cost me to stock up for baby. And (I just thought of this) aren't registries usually considered a favor to the guests? Like, "here's a list of things you know I'll appreciate if you need guidance in your gift-buying." At least that's what I was told when I was doing my wedding registry.

Just today, a girl was complaining about her mother saying the crib set she wanted was too expensive, and she was all torn up about whether she should just buy it herself even though they couldn't afford it. WHY are people dead set on things they can't afford, anyway? Shouldn't you be using YOUR budget when you decide on what you want? Is there a trend I somehow missed that $400 baby shower gifts are the norm, and you have a right to be offended if nobody will buy it for you?

Ugh. People.

In happy news, my baby shower was awesome, and I will post pics from that later. I went out today and finished stocking up, so now we're totally ready to bring a baby home. Now I just get to sit around for 6 more weeks wishing I was done being pregnant.

Blessed

2010-04-18T11:19:00.001-06:00

I browse pregnancy forums every once in a while. It's a good time waster. But all their vents really make me count my blessings, because I can hardly relate to any of them. And they are shockingly frequent. I just keep looking at all these vents going "Wow, that kinda sucks for you."

Things I am so grateful for right now:

~Absolutely #1 is my patient and supportive husband. I have my gripes with him, but seeing some of the issues these other ladies are going through.... wow. Brit is pretty much amazing.

~People at work... well, everyone all around me really... who never comments on how big my belly is, how I look like I'm about to pop, or any such nonsense. It's always "Look how cute you are!" Darn right I am.

~Along the same lines, everyone around me who never offers unsolicited pregnancy advice or old wives tales. I don't even think it would bother me all that much, but for how common this gripe is, I see it in my own life..... well, never.

~My in-laws. Oh, my in-laws. To read the message boards, you would think everybody in the world has psychotic, selfish, frustrating in-laws. In my life, my husband's family is like my second family. Or family version 1.5, because "second" would be too far removed. I love that they live so close, I love that they're so supportive of us... they are just amazing. I love visiting them as often as possible, and love it when they visit out here.

~My job... is getting hard, but that's to be expected at this point. In general, though, I have a great schedule, understanding coworkers, and confidence in my job security.

That's all I can think of just off the top of my head, but I think that's pretty good. Yay for a relatively easy pregnancy and people who love me!

Sleep

2010-04-13T17:52:00.002-06:00

Ok, so I'm a little confused. I thought most of the exhaustion associated with pregnancy came when I was doing the hard work of building a body from scratch. That even SOUNDS hard. At this point, I'm basically done building, and he's just working on growing and getting nice and chubby..... WHY am I still exhausted all the time? Yesterday, I took a 3 hour nap, and went to bed at about midnight. Didn't wake up until 1 PM today. At which point I ate a bowl of cereal, and went back to bed from 2-5. That's 16 hours, if you're counting. And I'm still sleepy, and would bet money I start crashing at 3-4 AM like I do every night I work. What is up with this?

I count myself infinitely lucky to have an amazing bed that I can still get comfortable sleep (thanks to Grandy), a billion pillows to support said sleep, no kids or others in the house keeping me awake, and a husband who is so incredibly patient with me STILL sleeping my life away. I don't think I'll ever have another pregnancy this easy.

Meal planning: week 1

2010-04-07T21:08:00.002-06:00

Success!

I decided while I was visiting my parents that I needed to try meal planning again, and take it seriously. I've tried and failed several times before, and I don't know what's gone wrong. But now that I have a baby on the way, I want to make a real effort to get in the habit of eating things other than hot dogs and macaroni & cheese. And a few days into my successful meal plan, I discovered another reason to eat a more balanced diet: apparently in this month of pregnancy, the fetus starts "tasting" what I eat, and what I eat now and while breastfeeding can affect what he'll be willing to eat in the future. So guess who's gonna be eating more vegetables now?

I know it's only been one week, but I think I've discovered the key to success. I plan with more detail, while leaving more wiggle room. I set aside a day once every two weeks to do plan the next two weeks of meals, noting which nights I work and planning around that. On nights I work, Brit cooks. On nights I'm free, I cook. And on nights AFTER I work, I plan on something super easy, or a crock pot meal that can cook while I sleep. And I leave one or two days each week open for "whatever" meals, and wiggle room if meals get pushed around. And then I look at what ingredients I need that I don't have, what's most immediately perishable, and plan shopping trips accordingly as well.

I've gotten through one week so far. Things got pushed around a little, when I canceled a meal or two and got sick of too much beef too many days in a row, but it WORKED. It's pretty stressful to have to sit down and plan out two weeks of meals... it's definitely an all-day adventure, and I need to get over my aversion to repeating meals... but it is SO NICE to not be having the 15 minute "conversation" every night about what's for dinner, and having something green only on special occassions. Or when Brit has gummy bears.

Hopefully this will last. I'm still in the process of planning for the next couple of weeks... feel free to make suggestions!

Humor

2010-04-04T17:01:00.002-06:00

Comedy is a mysterious thing. Why do people find some things funny, and others not? What makes something inherently funny? And why do so many people find disgusting things hilarious? When I was young, I remember seeing a shift from good cartoons to stuff that just grossed me out... and made everyone else laugh. Ren & Stimpy, anyone? And it's always baffled me. What is so amusing about dipping a live bunny into molten chocolate and eating the screaming remains before it dies? I don't know, but my facebook friends loved it.

Oh, and don't even get me started on the Year of the Dead Baby Jokes. I banned anyone from telling me those. Hate them. So much.

Shower me with LOVE!

2010-03-20T06:30:00.003-06:00

I'm taking a page out of Kristina and Brittany's playbook, and announcing my baby shower on the blogging world! Don't worry, somebody else is throwing it for me... I just barely managed to not have to throw my own baby shower. :) Anyway, if you want to come and celebrate my adorable fetus, email your address to jenandbrit~at~gmail~dot~com. The shower is planned for April 24, and I think we're going to try to send out invites by the first week or two of April, so don't dawdle.

Lots of love to Kari and Lanie for being the awesome friends to do this for me.

3rd Trimester

2010-03-15T17:49:00.002-06:00

I know I technically blogged my pregnancy update about my 3rd trimester a couple of weeks ago (or was that just last week?), but I feel like it just began in force, and I mean FORCE. Just after making that post, all of a sudden...

I feel gigantic. Even scrubs don't fit anymore, and I thought they would last forever. My winter coat BARELY zips... good thing it's about spring... and everything (especially underwear) is tight and uncomfortable. I've reached the point where I can't bend over to get stuff anymore (or really don't want to, anyway). I tried playing fetch with Chess the other day, and I can't do it, she's too good.... she drops the ball at my feet instead of holding onto it until I get it out of her mouth, and bending over 20 times to pick it up and throw it again is NOT my favorite thing.

My back hurts like mad, pretty much all the time. I walk out of work waddling like I'm 9 1/2 months pregnant and the baby's dropped..... but it's just my lower back making it hard to even walk. My left lower back is especially screwed up- if I'm bending over at the waist (as in, to put on pants or shoes) I physically cannot lift my left leg off the ground. It's so weird.

I have to pee ALL THE TIME. I don't know if my bladder is weaker with #2 or he's just sitting much lower, but I pee about 8 times on one night shift, and I didn't have this problem with Isabelle. I didn't even notice any change, with her. And yes, there have been VERY embarrassing moments when he's straight up kicked my bladder.... luckily only ever at home.

The fun part is: I can now squish my belly and feel little baby parts. It's my favorite thing to do. He pushes a little elbow or knee or something out, and I push back and feel it move across my belly trying to get away from me. I wish I could tell what's what.

In any case, with all the bad parts starting already, this is going to be a VEEERY long 3 months. Yikes.

Obscenity

2010-03-12T17:54:00.002-07:00

A completely random, very quick story before I head off to work....

A very long time ago, I pulled up to a stop light on State St, and watched a couple of 12-13 year old girls cross at the light. Suddenly for no reason at all, they started flashing the British "bird" at all the cars. Like they'd just learned what it meant, and thought they were terribly cool for knowing. I wanted to run over them on principle. It was a close call.

Brought to you by a memory sparked by the Boob Nazi's story (my first reaction while reading was "Um, did this peace sign happen to be backwards? Because I've got news for you....."). And for all two of you who don't read her blog already, she's having a giveaway.

26 Weeks (ish)!

2010-03-08T20:25:00.001-07:00

I try to do belly pictures every 4 weeks when I have my OB appointments. So this should have been done last Monday at 26 weeks, but due to my crazy (work) life, is only getting done now, at 27. Toooooo baaaad.

It's not even the best picture, but there's no way I'm going through the effort (of putting on pants) to do it again.

Seriously though, work is nuts. We're pretty much storing babies in closets. Not really, but it's close. I've been working 4 shifts (that's 12-hour overnight shifts, keep in mind) every week since the second week of February. And we're still short 3-5 nurses every shift. It's a strange feeling to be home all day today, and awake. At least, a little bit awake... I did manage to take a 3 hour nap and still be grumpy about waking up. Sleep has become a spectacular talent of mine... Anyway, I am so done with working extra shifts, and have only 9 more days before I GO HOME TO NEW JERSEY!!!!!!! I'm pretty dang excited.

Oh, what, you want an actual pregnancy update? Probably not. But for posterity's sake, let's bullet-point it out:

Obviously, I'm still extremely tired all the time. Partly due to work, but I think at least in part to growing a person still.
He's gotten very active, and I love it. My belly moves and wiggles in the weirdest ways. Sometimes I swear an alien is trying to bust out of there.
Sometimes the wiggling right after I eat makes me a little nauseous. It's a strange parody of the rolling your stomach does when it's really sick, so my body thinks it's sick, but it's just the alien.
I can hear his heartbeat with a stethoscope now, if he's in the right position.
Still craving nachos, sour cream, and salsa. Not so much with the orange juice anymore. And I'm back on diet coke.
I feel like I can't breathe when I'm sitting in church. Luckily it's only the church pews that really make me that uncomfortable.
He's big enough now to dig into my ribs. But luckily still small enough to shove out of the way. Doesn't help the breathing thing, though.
I'm having a lot of contractions. I don't think I had any with Isabelle, but now that I know my contractions don't hurt (much), I recognize them more easily, so who knows. I didn't even know I was having labor contractions last time until they were 5 minutes apart.

Kids

2010-03-08T07:58:00.002-07:00

I wish I could take a child development class or something before this baby comes out. I feel like I just don't understand kids, and their selfish illogical minds, and it makes me very impatient with them. Why do you need the toy that other kid has, and why do you think you can just snatch it from him? And why are you perfectly engrossed in whatever toy you're playing with, until I mention some other toy out loud to try and stop little Johnny from stealing little Susie's doll... and suddenly you RUN OVER because the toy I mentioned is the only toy you really wanted to play with all along and you must get there before little Johnny? And why doesn't this work when I want it to... Like when I invite someone to sit quietly in a chair, it doesn't suddenly occur to all the other 2 year olds that that's what they wanted to do all along. I vaguely remember learning about all this in my BYU Human Development class from years and years ago, but I don't really remember one little bit of what I learned, and it makes toddlers a foreign and frustrating species to me. Just stop being a brat!! What is so hard about that??

Evolution

2010-02-24T06:54:00.001-07:00

Well, my "mild-bronchitis but not really feeling sick anywhere else" has morphed itself into a full blown body-aching, sinus-swelling, mucous- dripping, throat-scarring something evil. And I woke up about 5 minutes too late to call out sick. Can I just tell you how miserable I am right now?

My throat is completely raw from too much coughing, to the point where I won't breathe deeply anymore because it will make me cough and it hurts too much.

My nose is red and horrid from blowing it so often with cheap tissues, made worse by having to wear masks all night and trapping it in a humid sickbreath-sauna.

My fingers and wrist are red and dry from washing my hands every time I blow my nose, which I've probably done at least once every 20 minutes.

My back and shoulders ache in that tired, sicky sort of ache that has no real source.

And let's not forget my hurting lower back, just part of the joy of being pregnant.

I cannot even tell you how excited I am to go home in 20 minutes. I am setting up a sick nest, and sleeping until Friday night.

Work and Life

2010-02-22T10:02:00.002-07:00

I've been signing up for extra shifts here and there for the mad money. On President's day, they put me on call for half the shift (the half that I would have mad holiday pay for... boo!), then come Thursday for my mandatory on-call, we're suddenly understaffed, overbooked, and almost literally shoving patients into corners. We had one baby that had to hang out in the hall until we could find a room for her. Every unit in the hospital is double bunking, and we've starting setting up rooms for 3 patients that were really only ever meant to hold 2. It's craziness! Respiratory season has officially begun. Seriously, don't bring your small children outside. Embrace the bubble. It's worth it.

This doesn't really change how much I've been working, except that I'm definitely working all the extra shifts I'm signing up for. But I'm doing it to myself. Because I'm dumb. And the money is nice. But now it's coming back to haunt me.... I came home yesterday morning (after working 4.5 shifts in one week) with a gross productive cough. I don't feel sick at all, except for the cough, and now the secondary sore throat from coughing so much. But I think I'll take a voluntary "sick day" today, and lay around and drink a lot and not do much. At least until I have to go back to work tonight. And after I walk the dog. THEN I'm totally not doing anything else all day.

More shows I love to hate....

2010-02-17T23:01:00.002-07:00

I caught the back half of a new (?) show tonight on TLC.... "Twins by Surprise." So I only saw two of the four cases, but those made me laugh, in a sad sort of way. The first delivered at home, with a "midwife" and a doula. I would bet $500 it was a lay-midwife. The second decided to do an unassisted home birth, no medical or wanna-be-medical personnel whatsoever. But don't worry, she researched on the internets, so she was practically like a doctor. The part that really made me laugh/cry was the first case when at the end, they were saying what a neat story it would be to tell their twins someday. Right. "Yeah kids, it was so awesome, we totally endangered your lives by not being prepared at all! How special is that? Love ya!" /eyeroll

Some Things

2010-02-07T11:59:00.004-07:00

The real problem with working nights is not that I miss out on sleep... I make up for it throughout the week. The problem is it does weird things to my sleep schedule in general. Like if I fall asleep on the couch because my back is killing me and sleep for a few hours, my body assumes it's supposed to stay up all night. So I don't get back to sleep until after 3 AM. It's workable, but awkward, and annoying when you're awake at 1 AM with nothing to do.

I'm really annoyed with Facebook right now. Updates seem to disappear between one click and the next, and the consistency of what/who shows up has absolutely no rhyme or reason to it. It makes me wonder what I'm missing.

I haven't had any real cravings yet, except orange juice.... I drink about a gallon of that a week... But yesterday I was craving Arby's. Apparently, the baby disagreed. It's a weird feeling to crave something, love every bite, but have every bite make you almost barf. Totally worth it. I also got Trix, my other "real craving" right now. I'm trying not to eat a bowl for every meal, but I don't know how well I'm succeeding on that.

I have a lot of random thoughts lately. I bought a notebook to write them all down so I don't flood facebook/blogger with random thoughts nobody cares about. But I guess I don't care about you enough today.

lolz

2010-02-06T13:37:00.003-07:00

(This is more for my husband, but it makes me giggle)

Reasons My Puppy Owns Your Puppy's Face

2010-02-05T21:23:00.001-07:00

I was just talking to a friend about Chess, and realized it's been a while since I informed the general populace (who reads my blog) about why she is THE BEST PUPPY EVER IN EXISTENCE. Allow me to enlighten you. And make you jealous. You wish your dog was as cool as mine.

~ Her #1 motivation is.... us. Or people in general. As long as she gets petted and snuggled, she'll do anything you want, and is perfectly content.

~She doesn't come in our room unless she's invited. Or on the couches, or the chairs. She knows what her boundaries are and waits for us to tell her it's ok. (The giant bean bag chair is her giant dog bed, though, as far as she's concerned.)

~ I can walk her without a leash. I usually do. And she stays right by my side, even when crazy stupid neighborhood dogs are running out in the middle of the street and yapping at us.

~When we're walking without a leash, she automatically sits whenever I stop walking, and sits before kids come up to pet her.

~When Ben's 10 month old kid wants to climb all over her and pet her, she lays down so she doesn't knock him over.

~When Ben's 10 month old kid drops a tasty treat on the ground (well, throws) she listens when we tell her to leave it and just watches us pick it up with sad, hungry eyes

~ When I eat my dinner with my plate in my lap on the couch, at perfect puppy nose level, she listens when I tell her "Go away" (even though I usually have to remind her several times) and leaves my dinner alone. And watches me eat with sad, hungry eyes.

~ We never worry about her running out the door when we open it, or even leave it open. Unless she thinks she's going on a car trip, then she'll try to get to the car. But bolting is not in her vocabulary.

~ She respects the kitty's space, even though she's fifty times bigger (and the kitty is kindof a bitch).

~ She likes to learn new tricks, and gets SO EXCITED when I pull out the treats. And when she doesn't get what I'm saying, she runs through the gambit of everything she knows trying to figure it out. It's the silliest.

~ She's figuring out the "trick" that was the hardest thing for her to do not very long ago... Laying down on command, when she's not right next to us. She really struggled with this for a while, but she's doing awesome now! I'm so proud of her.

~ She's cute and little and awesome.

Coupons

2010-01-30T08:41:00.002-07:00

I was at the grocery store the other day, getting a few things we need specifically for dinner and restocking a few things we were out of. Typical mid-size shopping trip. As I was checking out, the woman in front of me had a stack of coupons I was watching her ring up. As the checkout lady scanned coupon after coupon, her total came down.... and down.... and down.... until she walked away with a final bill of about $25. [insert shock and awe here] I proceeded to check-out after her. My final bill for a similarly sized cart of groceries? $75. It's almost enough to make me start couponing. My hesitation doesn't really come from the time and effort involved- although, I suppose that is a factor- but the idea of spending money (on a Sunday paper) in order to save a few dollars at a time on the grocery bill. But the idea has definitely been planted.

Love

2010-01-26T17:01:00.003-07:00

It's amazing how fast your attitude can change completely. When I found out I was having a boy, I admit, I was a little disappointed. I looked longingly at all the sweet baby girl clothes I wouldn't be getting. Now, just a few days later, I can hardly believe I even felt like that. I find myself looking at little boys everywhere, thinking of how cute he's going to be, and anxious to meet him.

How is it possible to love an alien-looking fetus I've never met this much? The feeling is completely overwhelming. I love him. I love feeling his kicks and wiggles, knowing when he wakes up and when he goes back to sleep... I can't wait to see him and kiss him and teach him everything he needs to know. To watch his personality develop into a little real person. Is it really possible to love him more after he's born? REALLY?? Because I don't think it is.

I love being pregnant so much, but at the same time, I'm starting to get anxious (way too early!) to be done and meet my little man. But this is definitely my favorite part of the experience, and at the same time, I never want it to stop. One of the nurses I was working with last night told me I was glowing. I can believe it. I'm so happy I feel like I might just explode.

More on Yesterday

2010-01-23T15:18:00.002-07:00

As you have probably inferred, yesterday was the Big Ultrasound Day. I was so excited and anxious about it, I almost gave myself a stress headache waiting through the morning and then on the way there. He was super wiggly all day, and I was a little worried that he'd poop out and fall asleep for the ultrasound, but we were in luck! He wasn't doing flips or anything, but he was definitely awake. We even saw him yawn.

There was a nursing student there for the ultrasound, and I've decided I like having students around for these types of things. I think the ultrasound tech would probably have been great anyway, but in general, I think having students there make the professionals explain more things more clearly. So we got great detailed explanations about everything she was doing. I also decided I really wouldn't mind having a student around when I deliver. For a lot of nurses, especially at a big hospital like this one, labor & delivery becomes "just another job," and "just another woman giving birth." Not really a special experience anymore. Having a student there makes it all special again, forces them to subconsciously see it through new eyes and explain things like the ultrasound tech did. And I want my delivery to be the most special delivery in the whole world, dangit, even if it's the ten millionth baby the nurse has delivered.

Anyway, that was a tangent. I'm trying not to ramble too much. After the ultrasound, we went to Babies R Us, where I finished registering (just for fun) and bought some little boy things to get me excited. I sighed a little over the tutus and bows and cute dresses I wouldn't be buying, but found a few stinkin' adorable things that I can't wait to stuff him in. Like a onesie with a frog on the butt!!! How cute is that? Very. Trust me.

After spending too much money at Babies R Us (the first of many, I'm sure), we went out to a late lunch at Carraba's, which is one of our favorite splurge restaurants. Or probably THE favorite. It was predictably delicious. I might have had a foodgasm. I could have sirloin marsala every day and be perfectly content.

Again, with the tangents.

So, basically, it was a great day. One of the things we bought was a GIGANTIC baby name book. A rather overwhelming baby name book, actually. But we're pretty stuck on boy names. We don't have any definite ideas yet, but we have some thoughts. Let me show them to you.

Some of my favorites are Jacob, Kade, Jayden, Alexander, and Tyler. Brit hasn't picked out any personal favorites yet, but some we've both discussed and liked are Seth, Shawn, and Corbin. And we tossed around the idea of a Corbin Seth Christensen. But those are all just thoughts, and based on our dog-naming process, this is going to take a long time, a lot of revisions, and a lot of new and completely different lists. Opinions on those names are welcome... Personal bad experiences with someone you knew once are NOT. Firstly, we don't care, and secondly.... well, we just don't care. But if you just think it sounds weird, then go ahead and say so.

Hmmm. We're having a boy. A little Brit. ...Now THAT is a scary thought.

Picture Update

2010-01-22T16:28:00.002-07:00

This is me:

This is my baby:

This is my baby exposing himself:

Let me be shallow for a minute.

2010-01-18T09:41:00.002-07:00

Well, ok, maybe not a minute. Maybe this entire blog has become the shallow ramblings of my pregnancy. But let's break it up and talk about something ELSE that makes me a silly girl I probably wouldn't want to know: Dinner.

Last night I made my mom's chicken enchilada recipe. It tasted just like my mom's, and there was mexican rice and shredded lettuce and fresh tomatoes to accompany the goodness. And I loved it. And Brit loved it (!). And it was just one more in a string- a STRING, I tell you!- of actual dinner-like dinners that I thought up and cooked myself. You probably don't understand the significance of this. Let me relate a typical night at the Christensen household: "What do you want for dinner?" "I dunno, what do you want?" "I dunno..." [an hour or so later] "Macaroni and cheese?" "Yeah sure." Our typical diet consists of mac & cheese, hamburgers, pancakes, and sometimes tortellini if we're feeling really crazy. So this is special, and it makes me feel a little more grown-up. Watch out for a cute picture of me in a sassy apron coming up! (Just kidding. I don't wear aprons. And I don't own a sassy one anyway.) (Am I a bad person if I kinda want to, now?)

Christmas in January!

2010-01-16T13:50:00.005-07:00

Now that Christmas is thoroughly over and you've stopped seeing so many Christmas updates.... Here's another one! I'll keep it brief. I just wanted to post some of my favorite pictures, and some highlights of the week:

Just being with my awesome in-laws
Learning how to play the dice game
Chess making a new best friend in my father-in-law
Going to the dog park
Setting up for an open house with my mother-in-law and sisters-in-law
Watching Brit and his brothers struggle to put a marble tower together
... and then watching the kids destroy it in about 5 minutes Christmas morning
Walking around the Broadmoor
Watching little Matthew learn what happens to his food when he drops it off the highchair with the dog around
Brit and his brothers learning how to fly the toy helicopters we got for Christmas
Getting a baby toy and layettes as part of my Christmas presents
Hiking at Garden of the Gods

I love my family! Enjoy the picture collages.

Random Memories

2010-01-08T16:00:00.002-07:00

You ever have a random childhood memory that is probably completely insignificant but you remember in startling detail and comes to mind at random times?

I'm sure you do.

There's one that's been sticking in my mind lately for some reason. It does that every so often. When I was maybe 8 or so, I thought I had a Super Awesome Super Cool And Original Talent. I could rotate my elbow 180 degrees while my hand/wrist remained stationary. Grossed out everyone in my 2nd grade class. Aren't I special? The thing I really remember, though, is our primary lesson on talents. Our teacher asked what our talent was. I proudly demonstrated the powers of my radius. And my teacher proceeded to tell me that that was no talent at all, anybody could do that, and tried to show me through his long-sleeve shirt. (That didn't work very well... you can't see through a long-sleeve shirt. So I didn't really believe him. But it hurt a little. And I stopped telling people I could do it.)

I don't know why this keeps coming to mind. It's so silly. But I wanted to share. I do have talents, darn it. Good ones. I just need to figure out what they are...

My Lovely Baby Bump

2010-01-04T19:58:00.003-07:00

These past two weeks, my belly has just exploded. I went from feeling rather pudgy as we left for Colorado, to feeling totally pregnant by the time we came back. Observe:

Me looking rather chubby with my sisters-in-law before Christmas:

Me looking rather pregnant today:

I'm pretty proud of my silly little bump. I walk around mentally shouting "Look at me! I'm with child!" The one damper in my high is realizing that every other woman in Utah has a similar bump. Especially going to a Utah family ward in a new development. Holy cow. I swear almost every woman I saw in the 2 hours I was at church Sunday was pregnant. That's what I get for having a due date in the popular month of June.

The baby is kicking much more regularly lately, and when he does it's obvious that it's the baby. Still anxiously awaiting the day when Brit can feel it, too. I still want to say it aloud every time I feel kicking..... but I'm pretty sure nobody else cares. Good thing I can still tell Brit. Like right now. There he goes.

Despite my prevalent use of the male pronoun, we still don't know the sex. I made the ultrasound appointment today. It made me REALLY mad, though.... my fabulous midwife tried to write the prescription to get the ultrasound in one week (I would be 19 weeks), but I have to go to the hospital to have it done because they don't have ultrasound equipment in the clinic. And the hospital is VERY strict about doing the appointment before 20 weeks EXACTLY. So now I have to wait almost three weeks (since I'm working so much that week) to find out what I'm having on January 22. Argh. I cried like a crazy pregnant lady. I got so hopeful that it would be done next week. I know, I know, it's not THAT far away, but trust me, it feels like forever. Every week feels like a lifetime lately. I'm really tempted to pay the money and have it done early, but Brit is putting his foot down and saying we can't afford it right now.

Sorry. That was a very long, probably very boring story.

In other completely unrelated news, Sadie is no longer part of our family. I don't really want to talk about it. It was a terrible, sucky decision, and I don't want to rehash any part of it.

Eventually I may recap Christmas, at least in pictures. I have a bazillion pictures. It was a lot of fun and a lot of chaos. I love my in-laws. We spent almost two weeks there, and I could have stayed longer.

Updates

2009-12-12T17:27:00.003-07:00

Two big things happened yesterday, pregnancy-wise.

First, as I was in the process of slowly waking up for work, I rolled onto my belly to find a more comfortable position for the last bit of sleep. And couldn't stay there for more than a minute or two. My uterus has officially popped out enough to make stomach sleeping impossible!

Second, and some MIGHT consider this a slightly bigger deal..... I was holding a fussy baby at work last night, watching Race to Witch Mountain (seriously, hardest job ever), and felt funny rumblings in my tummy. It took me a second or two to realize it was the baby, freaking out. Brit says the baby just doesn't like competition. I've felt flutters before that may or may not have been a baby, but I have to say that this is the first time I've really definitely felt him flipping around, finding a more comfortable position. And every time I was holding that baby (which I did for about 4-5 hours total), he kept flipping out. I loved it. There's a baby in there!!

Weight!

2009-12-09T10:22:00.002-07:00

I managed to get through my entire first trimester without gaining any weight... even losing a tiny bit... and then in the past week-ish, I've gained about 5 lbs.

I know, I know, I shouldn't be obsessing over this, but it's like a train wreck- I just can't look away. It's both horrifying and comforting all at once. I've spent the last several years closely monitoring my weight (to varying degrees of success), and I know pretty well what the junk I eat should do to my body. And it does not include packing on a pound a day. So there's a part of my brain that's going "Holy crap where is this coming from?!?!", and a slightly smaller part that is comforted by the knowledge that I really do have an alien rapidly growing inside me. Because in this in-limbo phase between morning sickness and showing or feeling kicks, sometimes I really wonder.

Still, though, I'm gonna start exercising and watching what I eat, lest I come out of this pregnancy 250 lbs. Which is where this is headed.

One down!

2009-12-01T09:12:00.004-07:00

Today, at 13 weeks and 2 days, I Officially end my first trimester! (The two days are for that extra un-accounted-for week 40... I'm splitting it up into thirds to make the trimesters fair, lol.)

I've been over morning sickness for a while, for the most part. I had about a month of constant nausea, nothing sounding good to eat, and throwing up a few times. Now, I feel sick if I eat too fast, or if I eat certain things, but it usually happens after the fact, so most of the time I feel completely normal.

So normal, in fact, that I am just frustrated with this pregnancy right now. I don't even feel pregnant! I'm still not showing, except in chubbiness that I mentioned before. I just barely started gaining weight, but I can't honestly tell you if that's from growing a person or eating too much on thanksgiving. I can still sleep on my stomach, which I view as the ultimate indicator of my uterus not getting any bigger. I can still fit into my stretchy-waisted jeans, unless I'm having a bad bloating day. I have felt the baby move a few times, but it's VERY VERY rare that I can feel it AND be sure it's not gas or muscle twitches. I'm incredibly tired all the time, but sometimes it's hard to tell if that's from growing a baby or working nights, because it takes me a long time to catch up. If I take the nap my body demands, then I'm usually awake at 4 AM the next morning unable to go back to sleep. If I force myself to stay up all day, I'm falling asleep on the couch by 8 pm. So sometimes I feel like I'm more tired than normal, and other times it just feels like my sleep schedule is off, but still totaling a basically normal amount.

Put all together, I sometimes wonder if the baby's even still in there. There's just nothing to really make me feel pregnant anymore. I'll be relieved to go to my appointment next week and hear the heartbeat again, and a thousand times more relieved to start feeling him really kicking and moving regularly. Sometimes I poke my uterus to try and make him wiggle. It never works.

The Obligatory Holiday Post

2009-11-30T10:15:00.001-07:00

Even though it was pretty much forever ago, I still need to make my obligatory Thanksgiving post. I was working Thursday, of course, so I spent the day sleeping and we didn't do anything to celebrate. On Saturday, however, my brother came down from Idaho and we had a small celebration together. I cooked my first ever Thanksgiving dinner.... and messed up a lot. It's hard not to focus on everything that was wrong (the turkey was dry, the gravy was flavorless, the potatoes were weird), but Brit and Andrew said they enjoyed it, and I certainly stuffed myself enough. I also discovered why people eat thanksgiving dinner so early.... we ate at a normal dinner time, about 5 PM, but by the time the apple pie was done cooling we were all asleep.

My fun disaster story of the evening: I had bought those frozen rolls that are supposed to thaw and rise, and then forgotten about them until 45 minutes before the turkey was done. So I hurried and grabbed them out of the freezer, dumped them all in a cake pan, and set them on top of the warm oven for a quick-rise. Unfortunately, I didn't realize one end of the pan was right in front of the oven vent.... and by the time I looked at them again, about 2 or 3 rolls were risen over the top of the pan, and the rest were still partly frozen. We let them rise the rest of the way anyway, and cooked them all into one giant roll-cake. In the end, they turned out pretty good... the ones in the middle are still doughy, but we have a lot of rolls for leftover turkey sandwiches. And that might just be my favorite part of thanksgiving, anyway.

This is our whole spread... we put the food on the table and ate buffet-style downstairs watching the BYU game. Which cut off 2 minutes before the end. Boo.

Me and Brit

Me and Andrew

My overly-filled plate of delicousness (I had run out and bought crescent rolls to replace my frozen roll disaster)

Happies

2009-11-29T10:04:00.003-07:00

I had a great conversation with my favorite little girl yesterday. I was texting Wendy about something random, and she asked if I wanted to talk to Isabelle. Well, of course!

So we talked for a few minutes, she sang me a song (holy cow she's so cute), and then I said "Isabelle, do you know I love you very much?" She goes: ".....[long pause].... Can I talk to Brit now?" It was so funny. And SO HAPPY. The last few times she visited, she seemed afraid of him. So this is progress in the extreme. And I love it. And I'm pretty sure it gave Brit the warm fuzzies, too, even though he had a hard time believing that Wendy didn't prompt it (she didn't.)

Spending Money

2009-11-24T13:22:00.004-07:00

We've been making a lot of big purchases lately. They always seem to clump together. Here's what we've been spending our money on:

It started with this:

A lovely find on KSL... a changing table/dresser with detachable hutch. I knew I wanted a changing table, and they are SO EXPENSIVE, I also knew I wanted it to be able to grow with the child and be a dresser someday. This is perfect. Lots of vertical storage, lots of drawer space, it looks good, and I got it for about half the price of any changing table I could find retail. Win!

Today, we got one of these:

And filled it with this:

To supplement this...

We've been looking at freezers for a while. As a family, our diet consists mainly of frozen pizzas, frozen tortellini, frozen chicken breasts.... You get the idea. We are not a fresh foods type of people, and our existing side-by-side was woefully inadequate. I would often be shopping and think "Oh no, can't get get that, it won't fit in the freezer." Now we can buy meats in bulk AND have a neverending supply of potstickers! Hooray!

And last, but certainly not least, about a week ago, we got ourselves another one of these:

Crazy? YES! But it was the right thing. For a while, our days kinda looked like this:

But with some good solid discipline, it's a little more like this:

So here's the thing. We've always talked about getting another dog. We never thought we'd stop with just Chess. Granted, we didn't think it would be so soon, but when we sat down and really thought about it, we knew it had to be now. Getting another dog is hard work, and total chaos for a while. You have to really devote yourself to training both of them, and setting down the rules. This would have been infinitely harder when I was hugely pregnant and couldn't move, and infinitely harder than that with kids around. So I tentatively agreed to let Brit start looking, thinking we'd begin the search in earnest after Christmas. Unfortunately (or fortunately?), he asked a trainer friend if she knew any rotties looking for a home, and that's how we met Sadie.

Sadie is a perfect cross between a rottweiler and a german shepherd. I agreed to meet her JUST to see if she was an ABSOLUTE PERFECT match for Chess.... and lo and behold, she is. They spent an hour running around a friends yard, wrestling and playing, and Chess is not usually a player. Sadie really brings out the dog in her, and they adore each other already. Sadie is definitely more Dog than Chess, a little crazier, a little more curious, and not as completely focused on her humans. But she's already mostly trained (she was rescued by a professional trainer), she's a beautiful smart girl, and she's the perfect sister for Chess. So, even though it's a little sooner than I expected, we are now a 2 dog family. And it's working out pretty well. I love both my puppies to itty bitty bits.

Growing

2009-11-22T14:55:00.003-07:00

Today, I went through about 3 different outfits trying to get ready for church, looking for ONE that doesn't make me look fat. It was mostly a failed attempt. I'm at a very awkward stage of the pregnancy now... My uterus is technically not making an appearance yet, but it's big enough to push all the fat up and out and make me look.... well, fat. I haven't gained any weight yet (actually lost a pound or two) (and that's probably good considering I was overweight to begin with)... but my favorite jeans won't fit anymore without rigging up the button hole rubberband. I just don't even bother with them anymore.

In conclusion, I need a lot more shirts with empire waists and flowy bottoms, because I feel gross fat, not cute pregnant fat. I don't remember it being this awkward last time.

Changing Perspective

2009-11-15T18:40:00.003-07:00

I've been reading Twilight again (I'm out of books, and night shifts are long, ok?). I used to love this book unconditionally, and have read it several times already. After seeing a lot of the negative reviews, though, I have a hard time not letting that taint my view. And this time around, it's a somewhat cynical read.

There's one thing I've realized this time. As far as I know, people have loved these books because they are the "universal perfect romance." I've always had a bit of a hard time with that concept, and now I've pinpointed why: It's not the perfect romance, but it IS the perfect fantasy. Everybody has experienced that entirely-out-of-your-league crush. The one boy in high school that makes you swoon just by looking at you, and makes you totally tongue-tied and sound like an idiot. This describes Bella's feelings for Edward perfectly..... except in this fantasy world, the out-of-her-league crush actually RETURNS her feelings. And what woman (or man, for that matter) hasn't wanted to feel loved and adored- or even noticed- by that one crush? Stephenie Meyer does a good job of descriptive writing, and pulling the reader into the emotions of the book. So readers get to live vicariously through Bella, experiencing the thrill of feeling special and noticed by someone who otherwise wouldn't be giving them the time of day.

Well, those are my thoughts on the matter, anyway.

Umm... Awkward!

2009-11-12T09:36:00.003-07:00

I've never been shy about sharing my adoption story. I love talking about it. But then, it hasn't come up too much in random conversations, and I try not to get into it unnecessarily. It's a hard story to condense into a few sentences and still have people understand, and it gets awkward when you launch into this big long story about having a baby and placing her for adoption.

I got a taste yesterday of the issues this pregnancy can cause me. I went to the dentist for a routine cleaning, and the dentist and everyone who found out I was pregnant (so, everyone who touched my mouth or asked me questions) asked the standard "Oh, so is this your first?" What do you say at that point, really? I guess it depends on the reason they're asking. No, this is not my first pregnancy. Yes, this is my first time being a mom. Usually I just explain no, it's not my first, I had a girl 3 years ago, and most people leave it at that. Great. The dentist went on to ask questions about my first, and comment on how busy I'll be. "Umm... yeah... busy...." Luckily he dropped it, but it made me think. What do I do when people ask those questions in the future? What would you do? Just say it's my first and leave it, explain the whole situation, or let people believe I have a three year old? This is going to be an interesting 7 months.

Really, Comcast? REALLY??

2009-11-11T22:17:00.004-07:00

You might recall my recent habit to rant about my cable provider. My first post about their inherent suckiness, somebody from Comcast actually replied in my comments and (among other things) suggested I program the 30 second skip feature into my remote.

My second rant post about Comcast, somebody (I believe the same person) emailed me and, again, among other things, suggested I program the 30 second skip feature into my remote.

So today, I tried to watch my recorded episode of So You Think You Can Dance. Two minutes in, the recording freezes. I tried everything to get it past that spot... didn't work. So I finally went back and programmed the 30 second skip to try and just jump past that bit. Well guess what, Comcast? IT DOESN'T WORK. I followed the programming instructions 3 times, and my husband (who is, btw, a comp sci major, not technically illiterate by any means) tried it twice. The 30 second skip doesn't work, and not just on my busted recording. Thanks for the advice.

Epic fail.